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Old 04-02-2011, 07:46 PM   #1
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feeling guilty

I recently went out with my mom who is 70yo. As we were walking I ran into a store and she was waiting outside. I then hear strangers calling me and tell me my mom had tripped and fell on her face. When I saw her she couldn't even talk because she was in so much pain. I feel so guilty that I was not with her when she fell- maybe I could have prevented her fall. Can anyone help me reduce this guilty feeling?

 
Old 04-03-2011, 05:32 AM   #2
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Re: feeling guilty

Hi well a person cannot tell the future how was anyone to know that was going to happen. It was an accident not on purpose. Maybe a stroke occured was she examined? Has she fallen before?

 
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Old 04-03-2011, 02:02 PM   #3
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Smile Re: feeling guilty

My mom had negative results for the ct scan of her brain and facial structures and also negative for the xrays of her hand and lower extremity. I am so thankful for this and for for your response. I will definitely keep a closer eye on her health and deficits. I thank you for concern.

 
Old 04-03-2011, 02:25 PM   #4
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Re: feeling guilty

Oh that's so sad, poor mom! It is not your fault though. Put yourself in your mom's place, do you think she feels it's your fault? She probably feels bad that you feel bad.
Accidents happen sometimes that are totally out of our control.
Take comfort in the fact that because you feel bad you have a caring and loving heart and you care about your mom.
I am around older people a lot. And just the mere thought of one of them falling down makes me feel terrible. I would much rather fall instead.

Hope you feel better. It's not your fault. Hey, at least she had you around and she wasn't off somewhere by herself.
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Old 04-03-2011, 06:39 PM   #5
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Re: feeling guilty

Hi I wish it had been an MRI instead. Sometimes a Ct scan does not pick up an aneurysm or clot in the vessels unless there was a dye injected. Also sometimes they are misread so a second reading may make it a bit more accurate. A second one for MRI's might also be needed sometimes things that are really there are not seen. Of course everyone is responsible for their own decisions. I am glad that so far it seems she will be fine. I would be watchful for any subsequent symptoms such as headache, dizziness, loss of balance or nausea. Was a dye used with the cat scan?

 
Old 04-03-2011, 10:01 PM   #6
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Re: feeling guilty

I have had years in my past where I was falling a lot (following 4 strokes). Every time it happened my first response was always embarrassment. Although I rarely went anywhere by myself because of this, invariably my caretaker was always two feet away, at the split second I fell. He always felt terrible, and I never wanted him to....

There is no doubt that your mother knows you would have done anything possible to catch her... IF it were possible, but it was not.

Please allow yourself to go on without a bit of guilt about this accident. I am sure she holds you free of any responsibility, and accept that your mutual love has not been affected by this fluke of the universe.

 
Old 04-04-2011, 05:38 PM   #7
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Re: feeling guilty

Thank you for your concern. She had the scan without the dye. She is feeling better. How soon should I take her for the mri?

 
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