still miss my sister - Grief & Loss Message Board

wyldflower · 02-05-2005, 01:03 PM

I am35/f. In 1998, my mom died of cancer at age 58. 9months later, my dad died at age 60 of heart attack. I miss them so much. Then, this year, my sister, who was 32, died after a tonsillectamy. Very sudden. She was my best friend. We were always together, even living together with our hubbys and my 10yr old son and her 7yr old daughter. No she is gone, and I cant cope. It has been 8months, and I still cry daily, and go between been sad she was taken away, and angry that she left. To top that off, her "hubby" started dating right away! Now he might be getting married to this not so nice "woman". Things are such a mess, and such bad things going on that I don't know what to do. How do I get back to being ok? I am like not even the same person I was before, and can't get back.

NYCityGirl · 02-06-2005, 03:39 PM

I am so sorry to hear about your parents and sister. Be comforted in knowing that they are together and they are watching over you.
There are support groups for people who are going through what you are going through that can be of great help and support. Do a search for Grief recovery support groups on the internet. You will be able to find many avenues of support and help.
Please know that you can and will recover. You will find peace within your heart.

God bless

Willow Star · 02-06-2005, 06:18 PM

Hi wyldflower....

I am so sorry for what you're going through. I lost my only sister (she was 38) just over a year ago and I too cry every day and probably will for the rest of my life. I miss her so much. I am lucky in that my brother in law and I get along very well and we are good friends. His only interest right now is the kids so I have not had to deal with what you are going through. My heart breaks for you because I know how painful all this is and to add that on top is just unimaginable to me. It is hard to find support for adults who have lost a sibling as I found out but there is some support out there. Please keep posting here as well as do a[removed] for adult sibling support groups...they can help immensely. It's a long hard road and I wish you lots of hugs and support....be easy on yourself and let yourself grieve as long as it takes.

Willow

sibling · 08-29-2006, 12:11 PM

I too have had to deal with a lot lately. I lost my oldest sister December of 2004 and just lost my older brother 3 weeks ago. I am having an extremely hard time right now. My remaining (how hard it is to say that) siblings and I have all starting reading a book by TJ Wray about Sibling grief that seems to be very helpful. Unfortunately, I can't remember the exact name right now (this seems to be one of the side effects of grief). I am also attending a Compassionate Friends meeting this evening to see how much support they offer. Each support group is different but Compassionate Friends often has support for sibling grief. Don't rush things. Everyone deals in grief differently. My favorite quote right now is "Abnormal behavior in abnormal situations is normal." So remember, you are not alone.