genster

My firend's husband died unexpectedly last month, he was only in his 30's. Now she is looking at being a single mother to their infant, and gets very freaked out when she starts thinking about it. I have tried ot be there for her, have helped her iwth the funeral stuff (my job is in this field) and heve helped with the baby. How can I get her to stop worrying about when her child goes to college, and just take things one day at a time? I try to give her the support she needs to grieve, but I won't let her go too far down the "how am I going to do this, I don't want to live" road without some reality checks. I under stand that she really does feel these things, but she will only come through this by taking one step at a time, and always stepping forward, not by moving back.. She is doing quite well, all things considered, but she lashes out at her family when they talk to her. She is displacing her anger onto them, I think. I have tried ot point out that they have also lost a family member, but she just snarls at them. It is very frustrating.
Am I doing the right thing? I have been through losses, but I react in a completely different manner, so I don't understand some of her responses. Help, please