Re: i dont know how to feel.. help?
of course you should be allowed to grieve. im not going to pass judgement on what you did. thats not my place, but right now, that doesnt matter. we've all done things we regret, i know i have, but you tried to make it right, and you need to remember that.
you loved him, he died, and you need to grieve.
of course, his family are in the centre of it all, and will be going through hell. what a terrible thing to happen. i cant imagine, really. but you're feelings are no less important.