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Old 04-17-2007, 08:48 AM   #1
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My Mom Passed Easter Sunday

I really need to get this out. I went home for Easter along with my younger sister. On Easter Sunday morning we were getting up so that we could go out to breakfast before church. My mom hadn't been sick and in fact the night before had been discussing going to her 60th college reunion with my dad. My sister Sally went to check on her and she was dead.

I am so lost right now. I am at work and I am totally non functional. I keep wanting to start crying and I want to go home and put the blankets over my head and never come out. My mother was the person I went to whenever I needed to talk to someone. She was loved and respected by everyone who knew her.

How do you get up each morning? How do you get through the sadness? I suffer from depression and I am feeling like I want to scream and cry and yell and let go somehow of all of the pain I am feeling inside.

I don't know what to do.

Sara

 
Old 04-17-2007, 09:10 AM   #2
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sally12 HB User
Re: My Mom Passed Easter Sunday

Hi Sara,

So sorry about you losing your mum, I lost my mum the same way she was fine got up in the morning and had breakfast she went for a nap in the afternoon and never got up again, if you want to cry and scream do it, you have to do what you want to do that might make you feel a small bit better and help you through this hard time, it is such a shock when death comes so fast with no warning, you can get through this but you need to look after yourself I know there is nothing that can be said that will help you or make you feel any better, keep posting I found this board great even though I did not post at the time just reading was a help, it's been nearly 2 years now for me and the pain is still there but it is bearable and there are days I think of my mum and smile I still cry but it is easier,

sending hugs and prayers to you,

Heaven now has to lady's it does not deserve.

 
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Old 04-17-2007, 09:57 AM   #3
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Re: My Mom Passed Easter Sunday

I know how hard it can be. My wife died last year and I am now on the other side of grief so maybe I can help.

1. You have to let it out. I did this in a number of ways. I worked out to get rid of some of my anger and hurt. I went to counseling every week and was very open and honest. I let my hurt out on a message board like this one. I yelled and screamed and yelled some more. I talked to a number of pastors. I journaled in a notebook every night before bed. Anything I was feeling or had felt that day I wrote down. I even wrote down memories...anything I was thinking. The journal was very helpful in my grief process.

2. Educate yourself. I read countless grief books...some of them two or three times to fully understand what I was going through. These books were written by people who had been through it. I also did searches on the internet for overcoming grief.

3. Find a couple people to lean on. I had a few people that I really depended on and they helped me so much.

4. Give it to God…..the number one reason I am now on the other side of grief. The death of a loved one is too much to overcome by yourself. Give yourself fully to God and you will be amazed at what he can do in your life.

I hope this helps. I will pray for you.

Jason

 
Old 04-17-2007, 09:59 AM   #4
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cher1052 HB User
Re: My Mom Passed Easter Sunday

Sara, I am so sorry--my thougts and prayers are with you and your family. If you need to cry--cry--I know it helps me! Take care, Cherie

 
Old 04-18-2007, 12:33 PM   #5
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Re: My Mom Passed Easter Sunday

I made it through today. I had two training classes and I made it. I don't feel desparate and I don't feel so lost.

I left work early yesterday and went home and took a nap. At some point while I was sleeping I swear I felt my mother touch my face. It couldn't have been anyone else.

So this morning I got up and I got to work. I wore a piece of her jewelry and I have sort of held on to it today. Somehow I new it was going to be a good day.

Thank you so much for everything you said.

Sara

 
Old 04-23-2007, 06:10 PM   #6
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sunshine149 HB User
Re: My Mom Passed Easter Sunday

I lost my mom the day after Christmas, about 4 months ago. We had a chance to say goodbye. she had been ill with a recurrence of cancer. I've read a couple of books on grieving and it did help. I am not a give it over to God type but I'm sure it helps people to talk to their god about what they're feeling. The first few weeks were intolerable. I felt like I was in a total fog. Sounds and smells were either too sharp or too dull. I would have no idea sometimes that people were talking to me, I just sort of nodded and murmured my way through it. Your relationship with your mom sounds similar to mine. We talked several times a week and toward her last few months, everyday and I saw her as often as I possibly could and I and my family spent 6 straight days at her bedside while she died. I don't know... i think the best anyone can do is build (slowly) around the hole that's left in our lives by the person we've lost.

I'll be thinking of you (and your mother).

 
Old 03-27-2008, 05:04 AM   #7
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jsph110 HB User
Re: My Mom Passed Easter Sunday

Quote:
Originally Posted by sunshine149 View Post
I lost my mom the day after Christmas, about 4 months ago. We had a chance to say goodbye. she had been ill with a recurrence of cancer. I've read a couple of books on grieving and it did help. I am not a give it over to God type but I'm sure it helps people to talk to their god about what they're feeling. The first few weeks were intolerable. I felt like I was in a total fog. Sounds and smells were either too sharp or too dull. I would have no idea sometimes that people were talking to me, I just sort of nodded and murmured my way through it. Your relationship with your mom sounds similar to mine. We talked several times a week and toward her last few months, everyday and I saw her as often as I possibly could and I and my family spent 6 straight days at her bedside while she died. I don't know... i think the best anyone can do is build (slowly) around the hole that's left in our lives by the person we've lost.

I'll be thinking of you (and your mother).
i pray you are feeling better.

 
Old 03-27-2008, 05:44 AM   #8
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limpster HB User
Re: My Mom Passed Easter Sunday

(((((Sarah))))) I am so very sorry about the death of your mom. My heart just breaks for you.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this time.

 
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