Death of Mother and Father
I lost my Beloved Mom to cancer on March 7, 2007, then my Sensitive Dad died one week later almost to the hour from a broken heart on March 14,2007. I had just started to heal from losing my Grandmother, my father-in-law, my Aunt, my Uncle and my two cousins, all in 2003(all on my Mom's side except the Father-in-law)I do not really know what to say except I am very lost, floating around in this world of grief and sadness. I am always tired, never leave the house and not really sure if I will make it. I do not sleep well and wake up nightly crying or so sad I cannot go back to sleep. Like tonight. I have been up since 3am crying. Just when I think i am getting better, I end up 4 times worse. Like 1 step forward 4 steps back. I have a caring husband and thoughtful children, who try very hard to help. They just do not understand. Its so very strange to be in a world where your parents are gone in one week and you will never be with them again on earth. I just cannot escape these feelings of loneliness and abandonement. I keep a daily journal of my feelings which seems to help a little. I know my life will never be the same and I keep looking for that Open Door but have yet to find it or any resemblance of it.