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Old 11-23-2007, 06:46 AM   #1
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Clear Lake, WA, USA
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ChristinaB57 HB User
Too much all at once.

Two weeks ago today my son witnessed his best friend/brother shoot himself in the head. Tommy called me Mama Chris and I called him Tommy my son. He was a truely wonderful 38 year old man. That night I had friends out trying to find my husband because I really needed him to be at home with me. My friends found him in bed with a female I have known for over 15 years. He has not been home since and is staying in another friends garage. We are in the process of building a house that I designed on our 5 acres of beautiful property and we have been living in our shop for the past year, I am still in the shop. Because I can not finish building this house alone and can not get a new mortgage by myself, it looks like I am going to lose the place I bought because I found the place I want to spend the rest of my life. I only work part time and get minimum wage. I started seeing a counselor to try to cope with all of my grief and also trying to help my son with his but he is not ready to see a counselor yet. Also I am 50 years old and have some medical conditions and my insurance is through my husbands company so I will be losing that also.
How do you deal with all of this at the same time?

 
Old 11-23-2007, 07:55 PM   #2
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Join Date: May 2006
Location: Atascadero ,Ca.
Posts: 540
kathryn+2 HB Userkathryn+2 HB User
Re: Too much all at once.

Wow ,I am so sorry. You've definetly been hit by many devastating losses all at once. The only advice i can offer is what worked for me when i was going through my own multiple losses that hit all at once. That was getting through it "one day at a time', a good friend to talk to,and antidepressants. I am not advocating that everyone go on antidepressants to get through grief and loss ,but it did help me deal with my losses in a less emotional way ,and after a year I figured that with that little "time out' I was then ready to fully deal with the losses without being so overwhelmed,. and I went off the meds. Wish i had the magic answer for you ,but i can only offer my own experience of dealing with being overwhelmed by loss.
Good luck...Kat

Last edited by kathryn+2; 11-23-2007 at 07:56 PM.

 
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Old 02-21-2008, 05:42 AM   #3
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 40
jsph110 HB User
Re: Too much all at once.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ChristinaB57 View Post
Two weeks ago today my son witnessed his best friend/brother shoot himself in the head. Tommy called me Mama Chris and I called him Tommy my son. He was a truely wonderful 38 year old man. That night I had friends out trying to find my husband because I really needed him to be at home with me. My friends found him in bed with a female I have known for over 15 years. He has not been home since and is staying in another friends garage. We are in the process of building a house that I designed on our 5 acres of beautiful property and we have been living in our shop for the past year, I am still in the shop. Because I can not finish building this house alone and can not get a new mortgage by myself, it looks like I am going to lose the place I bought because I found the place I want to spend the rest of my life. I only work part time and get minimum wage. I started seeing a counselor to try to cope with all of my grief and also trying to help my son with his but he is not ready to see a counselor yet. Also I am 50 years old and have some medical conditions and my insurance is through my husbands company so I will be losing that also.
How do you deal with all of this at the same time?
i really don't know what i can tell you because these challenges you are going through are not easy. you can overcome them though. i don't have the answers for you but i will pray for you.

 
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