| Re: Lost my dad 3 weeks ago
(((HUGS))) I feel so sorry for your loss right now, I was there myself 2 years ago with my dad. It is a shock, one that you think you can get your head round one minute then find you can't the next. It's a horrible time especially being with friends and family in that everyone reacts differently and you all want to comfort each other cos they are family. Yet sometimes you just wanna be left on your own to deal with things in your own way. You say you're finding it hard to keep strong for your mum, that I can understand but please remember that she is your mum and won't get mad with you if you can't. She may be a lot stronger than you realise. Sounds to me like you've got a very close loving family so please don't feel that you have to take all the weight on your shoulders and worry about staying strong. If you keep things bottled up you can make yourself ill. You've probably been told that at some stage but yes it is true. Been there, done that, had the counselling afterwards.... and I just wish that I'd had the strength and courage to come and talk to people or ask for help like you have on here. Different people deal with loss in various ways and I know it'll be hard when you go away without your dad but you've got to stay positive. You said that he loved the place and i'm sure that he would want you to try and enjoy it as much as he would have done.
Don't worry about how you are reacting at the moment.... laughing and joking then not wanting to talk.... people will understand.
It still hurts as much as the days pass but it does get easier and you'll get to a point when you can talk easily without getting upset.
One thing I personally found that helped me was to write a letter to my dad. I took the chance to write down everything that I felt was left unsaid and things that he knew. I took it to Landican cemetery and it did make me feel a bit better.
Anyway I'll quit yapping on for now, but if you want to talk then I'm willing to listen anytime and i'm sure there are plenty of others who will as well. Take care of yourself anyway.
Poppy x
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