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Old 01-02-2010, 08:27 AM   #1
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Unhappy My mom died 1 month ago

My mom passed away after thanksgiving after a long battle with cancer. She and I had an argument a week before she passed. We didn't talk that whole week. I miss talking to her and I don't have any one to talk to. I am lonely and sad. i am now caring for my father. He is partially paralyzed. and can barely speak after a stroke that her had a year ago. They were married 35 years or so. Any comments or advice is appreciated.

Last edited by Kaylani27; 01-02-2010 at 08:28 AM.

 
Old 01-02-2010, 11:48 AM   #2
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Re: My mom died 1 month ago

First of all I want to tell you how strong you are for taking care of your father. I have worked with people that have not been able to communicate and it is very difficult. Especially for you and dealing with the loss of your mother. Your father probably has a lot of things that he would like to share also, he must be frusterated that he cannot let it out. You need to find a way that you could communicate with each other whether it be nods or if he can use a writing utensil in any way. You can also be creative and try to come up with your own system. Can your father understand what you say? < edited >

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Old 02-28-2010, 07:45 PM   #3
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Re: My mom died 1 month ago

First of all my sincererest condolences on your loss. Do your best to remember the good times you have shared with your mother. All of us have arguments with our moms; it's inevitable!! No doubt her unconditional love lives on in your heart. I lost my mom 1/21/2010 and I do my best to remember the good times. I cry a lot too!! My heart goes out to you.

 
Old 03-01-2010, 07:46 AM   #4
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Re: My mom died 1 month ago

Just want to say thinking oif you all x I lost my mam just before xmas unexpected, cancer which had spread after been treated she was dead within 2 days of finding out. What were all feeling is natural all of it cant stay on long but just had to reply take care all xxx

 
Old 03-06-2010, 05:56 PM   #5
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Re: My mom died 1 month ago

My mom died 2 months ago after a long battle with pulmonary fibrosis. I used to talk to her on the phone every day. I remember the last time we talked. She wasn't really listening to me so after a few minutes I told her I'd call her tomorrow. Well, she went into the hospital the next day. The doctors put her in a coma like state. 20 days later she died. No matter what, there is always regret. We lived far away from each other. I regreted not visiting more often, I regreted not talking to her for longer that last time, I even regreted not buying her more gifts during the holidays. She was the only family member I was really close to. She and my dad were married for 31 years. I wish I had advice for you. What I can say is, don't let one argument define the relationship you had with your mother.

 
Old 03-10-2010, 12:25 PM   #6
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Re: My mom died 1 month ago

Quote:
Originally Posted by AEHqt314 View Post
First of all my sincererest condolences on your loss. Do your best to remember the good times you have shared with your mother. All of us have arguments with our moms; it's inevitable!! No doubt her unconditional love lives on in your heart. I lost my mom 1/21/2010 and I do my best to remember the good times. I cry a lot too!! My heart goes out to you.
I do agree with this wholeheartedly. My father lived with me after my mom passed in 2007 and toward the end, even as recently as a week before he went into the hospital, he and I had some arguments... Well, they weren't arguments as much as they were getting pretty mean/snippy with each other but he knows that I love(d) him and I knew the same from him. Your mom knew, regardless of any prior arguments, I'm sure of it.

 
Old 04-11-2010, 02:59 PM   #7
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Re: My mom died 1 month ago

Let me start out by saying I'm so sorry for your loss! My mom died on Halloween of last year so it's been about 5 months and my heart still aches as if it was yesterday. My mom and I had our share of arguements in the weeks before she died that I wish I could take back but I can't. Mothers and daughters fight and argue so please don't beat yourself up about it. I know it's hard not to; I sure have been, but your mom knows you loved her. My mom always said to me, " Honey, even when we fight and argue, we always know we still love each other." Talk to Jesus. I don't know if you're a Christian but I know that if I didn't have Jesus in my life I'd be in an insane asylum. Jesus never gives us anything that we can't handle without Him. Talk to him. I'll be praying for you and your father. God Bless You.

 
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