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Old 03-03-2011, 07:35 AM   #1
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death of 16 year old cousin Tuesday morning

My 16 year old cousin was killed in a biking accident. He enjoyed racing motorcycles and on Tuesday morning he lost control of his bike and crashed turning the corner of the track. How tragic this is the entire family! He passed away in the ambulance en route to the hospital with his father at his side. It seems like one death after another in my family and all ages. I am feeling so lost, hopeless, angry, and despondent. I don't know how much more of this I am going to be able to take. It is really getting overwhelming and extremely stressful. Any support would be greatly appreciated.

 
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Old 03-03-2011, 01:44 PM   #2
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Re: death of 16 year old cousin Tuesday morning

Hi, i am so sorry for your loss. I know how you feel on so many levels. I lost my 38 year old sister in July of 2004 from melanoma and she left behind my 4 year old niece. I lived the next 4 months or so second to second and minute to minute. I wondered if i would ever be able to get thru a day without breaking down and feeling so sad. I spent alot of time with my niece and that was a blessing but so very hard when we would talk about "mommy" and her being with Jesus in the sky. I cannot believe it has been almost 7 years, a day rarely goes by that she is not thought of or smiled at. I think that helped me prepare for the sudden death of my ex- brother in law and ex husband 4 months apart in 2009 and the death of my Dad a year ago Feb.5th. I can now see that i would not want them to be in pain here on earth but that does not fill the void in my heart. I believe we will see our loved ones somwday and that helps. I look upin the sky and look at the stars and tell them all hello quite often and it brings a smile to my face. I am glad for the memories i am able to recall and the oictures i can now look at wiyhout falling to pieces. I had a great support system and my faith in God has grown so very much. I wish you the best and will say a prayer for comfort.
Tracey

 
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Old 03-04-2011, 08:12 AM   #3
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Re: death of 16 year old cousin Tuesday morning

Hi Tracey -

thanks so much for the reply. My cousin's death adds to the list of complicated grief issues that I continue to struggle with. My best friend at age 28 died from breast cancer, my uncle died in 2009 from lung cancer, my maternal grandfather's 11 year death anniversary is 3/9, and I have lost many friends over the past 10 years to illness, car accidents, and one to suicide. Grief always seem to be difficult for me to deal with. I find myself in a caretaker role and then if the person does not survive I am consummed with guilt and often take it out on myself. The funeral for my cousin is tomorrow. I have to be honest, I am not looking forward to going. I know that sounds aweful, but I just don't feel like dealing with any more grief. My family is devastated and it is really going to be a difficult day. Anyway, thanks again for your knid words!

 
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