I have very, VERY curly hair and I think I have gotten it's maintenance down to a science. I never realized until I wrote this message what a detailed routine I have though! It might not work as well for you as it does for me because you are a guy with short hair and I am a woman with longer hair, but it might be worth it to try it.
Bear with me here, cause it's a little wordy!
First, washing more than twice a week is going to make your curly hair very dry and frizzy. Just wrinse thoroughly on the other days. Nobody has curlier hair than me, and my hairdresser and I pretty much have it figured out. I wash about twice a week with a shampoo called "Drench". On the very dry days I use a leave in spray conditioner called "The Cure". Both are made by a company called I.C.O.N. Products. It has to be purchased at an upscare salon, but not all of them carry it. I had very, very, very frizzy hair before I started using this. It is sooooo much better now! I have more well defined, shinier curls with no more frizz. OK, the shampoo is the first thing.
I also get a Cellophane tint about every three months, which in addition to giving my hair a natural looking red hue, works to moisturize it very nicely, which is why I don't need conditioner. Since you are a guy, you could just get clear. It's not very expensive at all (about $30-$40). It makes my hair very shiny and healthy. I have no more split ends AT ALL! My hairdresser now tells me that my hair is extremely healthy looking. Prior to getting the Cellophane treatments, it was very, very dry and I had a ton of split ends. No more!
Oh, and the more you wash, the faster the Cellophane is washed out.
I shower at night, and when I come out of the shower I just towel dry my hair and run a comb through it. It your hair is brittle this would be when you would use the spray leave in conditioner and just towel dry with it in. To style, I use a spray bottle to make the hair damp in the morning. I comb it again to get out any knots and seperate the curls more. Then I use GelAqua (by Image) to style. I probably have longer hair than you do, so you could probably use a little less than I do. I use about a half dollar size dollop and rub it in my hands. Then I go under my hair and run my fingers through it with the gel, and then run my fingers through it on top too. Sometimes I use a product called "Strait-Line" by L'Anza with the GelAqua, just to relax the curls a little bit so they aren't like springs! Just run it through with your fingers. Then I blow dry on low heat with a diffuser touching my hair as little as possible. The whole thing only takes about 5-10 minutes in the morning. If my hair seems to be a little bit limp in the morning, after putting in just the gel or the gel and relaxer, I use something called "Curls Up Curl Booster" that I found in the hair section at Walgreens. It's a spray that you apply and then scrunch up your curls to make them a little tighter. It's an orange spray in a clear bottle with a purple top.
So basically, just don't shampoo so much. Use a good, heavy weight styling gel and maybe a little bit of curl relaxer. Blow dry on low heat with a diffuser. (the diffuser is what stops your hair from getting frizzy when you blow dry). Maybe get a cellophane if you don't mind sitting under the dryer for 30 minutes with a cap and cotton on your head! And most importantly find a stylist who KNOWS how to cut curly hair! You can't cut curly hair the same way you would cut straight hair or it frizzes up. It's a science!