 Please help me. Why do these things happen?
Hello, I am a female of 18 years old. There are things about myself that I wish I could understand and know the reasoning to. You see, I have these headaches that attack me every other day, or sometimes every day. At times, even a few times a day. They do not hurt too bad, like migraines; however, don't get me wrong, they do indeed hurt me. Once I get these headaches my head feels all warm and my thought process slows down. I can not seem to think straight, and then I noticed that my emotions all transform into anger. The headache is massive, and I sit there wondering why I am so angry, and over nothing at all. That creates more anger. It causes confusion, which creates more anger. I get to the point to where I just want to yell and scream, or get up and destroy things. It makes me want to attack something, or someone. The good part about it I suppose is that I can control my actions.
Yes, there are times where something said to me can trigger my anger, and it moves on from there. Even sounds disturb me, if I am irritated enough.
Another thing, I think way too much. I over analyze everything. I think about the negatives rather than the positives. My mind moves quickly and runs through everything. Sometimes I think of a million possibilities for a situation to either fix it, or something, and I will sit there forever thinking. Hmm, times where my mother is irritated with me, she gets mad because I talk back to her... But, that is just my mind constantly running, becoming angry, and it just makes me blurt out something if ****ed off enough.
I think too much, I worry too much. Sometimes when I get into that worry mood my heart pumps weirdly, slightly faster than before. My breathing is short and slow, and at times my body starts shaking. What is that all about?
I have a boyfriend, and unfortunately he is far away. It is an online relationship, for now. Anyway, there are times where I am being mean and throw out insults. Times when he is speaking to me sweetly and I basically throw back every comment. Sure, there are times when I am in that nice, fantastic, lovey dovey mood....but then there are times when I am being a complete jackass, and if I upset him, I feel like an idiot...which then upsets and ****es myself off.
Basically, I want to know why I have these headaches. Why do I become so angry? I mean like...I literally get very ****ed off, and then... Later it goes away like nothing happened. There are days where I just don't eat. What is up with that? I just do not feel hungry.
=[ is there something wrong with me? I have had past lifely-problems, although... I am sure I am passed them. This anger, headache, and worrying needs to go away.
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