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Old 03-21-2010, 01:01 AM   #1
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Join Date: Mar 2010
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wildtexspirit HB User
Post Was told I have an echo in my heart.

I am new as of tonight to this site. I am very happy to see that others have such an interest in helping others and don't shun you. With that said now to why I am posting in your thread posting.

I also am going through preMenopause or however it is spelt. xD I was told by my Gyno that I am. But I have been having symptoms that are not related to that. I can't afford to go to the doctors for my other problems that I have started to get. So I have become my own gyneepig(spelling is probably wrong there. I have found a lot of things to help certain things. But one thing that I had happen right before I found out that I was going through it was my heart beats started to do some really scary stuff one night. I decided to have a drink with some friends. It doesn't take much for me to get even typsy so I drank about a shot glass amount of wine and then didn't feel right. I wanted to have another sip but felt too scared so I placed it down on the table and walked into my room.
I sat down on the side of my bed and decided I should just go on to sleep. That always helped me when having panic attaches and that was what I thought I was having. Then out of no where my heart began to beat really strange. So strange that it was scary. I laid back thinking that if I could just go to sleep. I began to pray and beg even to God to help me. I thought I was dieing right then. The feeling were as followed---heart beat would feel as a skip then got worse as to thud then felt as though it was going to stop. Then beats did this so close together that I could not get a breath. I began to do breathing exercises ....did not help...then I decided to drive myself to the ER. Everyone was asleep in the house but me and it was about 2:30 3:am. As I drove my heart still continued to beat like it was. I thought forsure I would end up running off the road or running into another car harming someone else. I drove slower. When I got to the street of the hospital I drove a little faster. I was told as I walked into the ER about that . lol
I continued to the counter as I was being yelled at and passed out on the nurse's station desk as I leaned forward to tell the Nurse to help me. They must have grabbed me and brought me on into a room. I opened my eyes to see a woman telling me to breath and stay calm that I was okay and in good hands. I had this feeling like my heart was no longer in my chest but in my neck. Not my throat now but in my artery. I had this feeling in my chest that hurt and felt like something scratched the crap out of my ribs and lungs. I told this to the woman and she just smiled and said you will be fine we are tring to find an open bed for you. Soon I was in a bed in the ER and covered by warm blankets. The male nurse stayed beside my bed rubbing my left arm.

He kept telling me that he wouldn't let anything happen to me and that I would be fine as well.I noticed I had an IV in my arm as well. I asked if I had been given something to calm my heart down or to fix the strange beats. He told me no that they were observing me. O.o So I thought okay maybe I am being taken seriously then. But my heart wasn't getting better it seemed to stay about the same but just a tad bit worse as the hours went by. Then the beats went back to normal. But that wasn't the thing that worried me. lol The male nurse stayed beside my bed while rubbing my arm. I looked over at him and asked him why was he still there? I thought for sure he would say that he liked me or some funny thing like that. He told me that my heart worried him. So I gave him this look as if to say..."DO What?" lol

He smiled and said that he didn't like the way my heart was still racing. I had to look up to see what he meant cause I didn't feel that part. lol Sure enough it was fast and still giving the big beats that I was feeling before hand but no longer felt as bad. He told me he would be right back. I really got scared and my heart thingy went off for some reason. I got all hot and freaked out a little. Then he came back and told me to calm down that I was causing my heart to beat way to fast. Then told me that he was talking to the Doctor and he wanted to keep me over in the Hospital another night. They need to watch my heart more and make sure I will be okay. I told him I was scared and that it never did this before. He just smiled again and said that is why they wanted to keep me over and find out what is causing it. lol I was happy to hear that . Who wouldn't?

Okay a few days later after being released from the Hospital I was to go get a stress test done which I did. Also a echo gram and EKG reading and then have a monitor to be worn for a whole month. I did all this . The stress test was me walking and slowing getting to a run as they watched on the EKG machine to make sure if I had another problem they would be able to know it. The monitor kept going off but when I went back to find what the readings were they told me that everything was fine that there were a few times it must have malfunctioned. Then the doctor placed me on a beta blocker called "Toprol" that did nothing for me. He told me that nothing will help this that is a normal thing that everyone is born with. I begged at that moment to please help me that I don't want to die in front of my kids. He told me to calm down that I would be fine and I will live to be a ripe old age. yada yada.

Well I just learned to watch what I did for the time after that. I would keep my mind busy is what I told myself. I would take sleep aids over the counter to calm me down as my sister a addict once told me they do for her. So I did that. But I don't like getting on something that might make me like her so I thought I would take them only if I had my heart start up again. so I did that. Time went on and I would go back to another doctor to have that one tell me the same thing or just give me a smile and some kind of drug that could cause another problem. So I went back to work. That helped for a while til about a month ago. I was at work and just out of the blue I felt funny. I just shrugged it off. I continued to work. One of the customers came up to me and said ." Are you okay?" I raised an eyebrow and smiled and giggled even. "Yeah I am fine" . She told me that I didn't look okay that I should sit down. lol I told her why would she think that? She told me that my face was red as my hair. I have dark red hair and there was no way. I found the bakery shelf and looked into the mirror in the background. I was then cared. I was so red then I got burning hot. I told the other worker that I was fine that is because she made me scared and that I was having a panic attach now. lol No offense I told the lady. That it happens with my brain. and then giggled and went to the office and sat down for a few seconds doing my breathing. I got back up cause well I thought everything was fine.

Then I was asked will I be okay? I said yeah I guess. Then looked up at my customer (which happened to be a Registered Nurse) I went to ring her items up and she said it.( lol I was like come on now to myself ) I told them I feel fine and the lady (RN) told me I should go to the ER that she is a registered nurse. Was there anyone that could drive me there? lol wow..... Anyways I ,at that moment began to feel it out of no where. My body got like sleepy feeling and my shoulders hurt between them and my arms were like heavy. I couldn't see and my head felt strange like I was high on something. I couldn't speak and thats when I went to the floor. I remember the Nurse lady telling them to call 911 and my other worker was dialing I guess. lol I remember the nurse grabbing the rolling chair from the office to where I was telling me that I would be fine. all I could think at that moment was my kids.

She took me to the office and then took my blood pressure and told me to keep my head between my legs. (all I could think was what my brother would say when we were kids..(Put your head between your legs and kiss your butt goodbye...) The paramedics got there and took over. I Never want to be in another ambulance unless I am out of it and can't feel anything. lol they put an IV in your arm as your moving in the ambulance! lol)

Well I went to the hospital after that of course and I began to see another heart doctor. I ended up with no help again. I was scheduled for another monitor 24hour one this time. But didn't have the money so I had to drop that appointment and the next one as well. So now I am without a doctor for my heart all because I can't afford it.

When I was about 18 I was told I had a mur mur. Now I am told I have an echo. I also have reflux which at the time when I was 18 told this as well. My mur mur didn't bother me at all til I was around 35. Now at 40 it hit me really bad and now I am dealing with about 4 to 5 a minute. and I just turned 41 in February. I do get my mood sings and hot hot flashes and then cold flashes. irregular periods and bad cramps with it. But by far I can handle that stuff dealt with so much worse in my life. lol But for my heart to do these things . no no I can't handle this. The one things I know I can't live without is my heart and lungs first most besides the fact the things it does causes me to do my everyday things like be around my family and deal with everyday life stuff and work as well to pay for bills like doctors. I just hope there is an answer to this soon. I do smoke cigarettes but nothing else. I cant drink cause of either no time too or just don't care for it unless I have one. But sodas? no if I do it's decaffeinated and I eat and sleep and well I have lost weight but not cause I don't eat cause I do. lol

I take Pepcids cause I have had a spike in my reflux since this started. I was given some Nexium by a friend to try and see if it helped me better. It worked well for a while and then it seemed to do no good. So I am back to Pepcids. I have even started to eat yogurt which I hate. But it just causes my stomach to hurt. I am Lactose in tolerant. I have more aches in my bones it seems than I use to and my eyes seem worse as well. My arms aren't long enough. But I can't sit at my desk very long my eyes begin to make me feel like I have taken something that effects my vision.I keep getting my heart murrmurr more when I am at my desk sitting in a forward position. I also can't lay on my left side but my right side seems okay to lay on. I end up laying on my belly. I don't take sleep aids as much as I use to. Unless i have to fall asleep fast cause I work early or I have to get sleep to get up early for something. One day a weeks ago I was having problems with my heart and called my doctor and begged for something to help . They proscribed me X a n a x-A l p r a z o l a m . It helps without feeling like I am all drugged out or something. lol But doesn't keep the heavy heart beats from going away. I can work while being on them as well. But I am to the point of saying I just don't want to worry anymore I will take anything that can keep me from worry or caring. I just want to cry when I see a teenager. I think why can't I have a normal heart beat like that kid. or even see an adult smiling and laughing and wish the same about that as well.

I once told one of the other female workers if I just died and fell to the floor would be better off for my kids and myself . They would be rich and I won't have to deal with it anymore. I just can't take it much longer. No one in my family knows or understands what I am going through. They all think it's in my head and that ohh it's just another one of your panic attaches. BUT ITS NOT I tell them. I can deal with those. I know the brain is messing with me and I know that I am not dieing or I would be dead already. But when my heart messes with me then that is totally a different story.
Ohh my I just saw how much I typed. I am so sorry you have to read all this. But to understand where I am coming from I had to. I hope You understand. Thanks for taking time to read this . If you have anything you can help me with please feel free too. Thanks ~Patty

 
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