I know the staticstics say that one in five adults have HSV2 and the number is even higher with HSV1, but I have HSV2 and I have had it now for 3 years and honest to god, I feel all alone. I do think I am the only one I know who has it. Last night as I stood in a crowded building I looked around and thought I wonder if they asked everyone with HSV2 to raise their hand how many others their would be? I know most people just dont talk about it because well, its not one of those topics people really chat about, but I have a lot of friends and people I am close with and nobody I know has it, just me the person that gave it to me and his current victim (which I warned). I know this probably has something to do with the fact that I just got over a OB and then just 2 days later , here it is again, its been weeks straight, it feels like months, Im miserable. I feel all alone and I just needed to vent. I mean I know this site is here and that helps a litte, but how many of us are on the site, like 30 or so? I just feel like the number they give this 1 in every 5 people is crap! If that was that case, I would have met someone by now that has it!
You are not alone. I feel the same way. People say the word in the bar like it is the plauge. Not like it really is a flu. With society who wants to be the first to come out though. My best friends do not even know only my ex that gave it to me. Just look at the board their are many people more everyday. I still beleive in the next 5yrs. their will be a cure.
I know what you mean by constant OB's. I feel like I have the flu ever other day and am tired of feeling this way. I also hate feeling sick and my friends must think I am a hypocondriac. I cant tell until a day later if I am really sick with the flu. You can only use the flu thing once as a complaint especially at work. I dont want to be ill or percieved as ill but its hard when you have zero energy, and feel like crap! I can deal with sores but the overall feeling bad is hard to take. I have a Rx for Valtex but am too broke and no health ins yet to get it refilled or buy any alternatives.
My life has been major hectic lately (lost love b/c of H, change of careers, lost a beloved cat suddenly- had to put down) and therefore my stress level is huge! And now out of the blue I just decided to move into a new apartment (great deal and couldnt pass up). With everything going on I wasnt even looking for more change but boom and boom more OB's
Guess I am just commiserating here, I feel your pain!
Also- why isnt there more situations of H and std's on TV! They have all of these single people having sex with everyone and no one even mentions H. Its a disease that needs more attention in a truthful supportive light. Trust me a majority of those people in bars have it too.
Last edited by karenscorner; 02-24-2005 at 03:33 PM.
Surveys consistently show that the rates of HSV2 in the US are between 17-25% although the figures are dropping (and are somewhat lower in much of Europe for some reason - closer to 10%).
If you asked people to raise their hands, not many would! Some people would not admit they had H and a lot don't even know they have it. It sucks for those who suffer badly as they have to deal with the OBs and a stigma that those who don't know they have herpes don't know about!
Thank you everyone for writing back, I feel less alone in this. I agree not everyone would raise their hand, just a nice thought. Wish this was a more open subject.
Karen, I am so sorry to hear about your cat, I have 4 and I dont even know what I would do if I was faced with the decision of putting them down! Im so sorry.
As for your constant sick feeling, Ive been there. I fixed it by taking a nap every day after work for about an hour, and taking a daily multi vitamin. That pretty much fixed that. I also started drinking a ton of water, it worked for me.
Thank your writing, this is just such a miserable thing to go through. Just as I forget I have it and life is normal, Im reminded again.
It's funny, but i've had the same thoughts run through my head. I'll be sitting in a cafe or in my car or dealing with customers at work and it does cross my mind "i wonder if my waitress has herpes" or i wonder how many patrons in the cafe have it or people i serve at work. I don't think it in the terms of "re-infection" or "germs" etc, just wondering how many people really have it and how they manage to get on with their daily lives.
My herpes went on for a few weeks, then cleared to the point of me feeling normal again and then i got it within days all over again. I refuse to take medication and now it's been 3 and a bit months and i feel as though my body is getting used to it. I too take multivitamins, garlic capsules, try to eat as healthy as i can, drink lots of water, take lysine, try to keep away from foods which kill off lysine, get a proper nights sleep, have more "me" time where i'm doing things i enjoy doing, whether it's reading a book and being lazy or being social with a friend.
Nobody knows i have this apart from the person who gave it to me who i am still with. I also agree that genital herpes should be mentioned more on tv as i think so many people think they will never get it or think you can only get it if you aren't using a condom or that "easy" people who sleep around and have loads of one night stands only get it.
Sorry to crush someone's hopes, but i doubt any scientist will come up with a 100% cure. I can't see pharmaceutical companies losing so much money over a cure for a virus which isn't life threatening. That's why i refuse to take medication unless i was in immense pain. But that's just me, others may view it differently.
The cure will come from a scientist who has it not a company. Their are leading researchers on this and it is a game they want to win. Who would not want to be known as the scientist who cured the uncureable. Notarity will save us....... vain human pride. You can say what you want but if they advertise a cure you will be first in line.
Someone just said it is on the decline, how did people stop having sex or are people getting educated? I do not care if a Dr.'s Daughter gets it and that is why he finds the cure as long as they find it.
My ex gave it to me who I am no longer with. I hate her for it. I hope you stay with your current but always look out for yourself also.
I am kinda with the whole why find a cure when the money is in the treatment!!!! If they had a cure they would loose the millions of dolalrs spent on valtres and various herpes medications!!!! I think they have the cure and choose not to develop it fully. I mena they can come up with products such as lysol that kill HSV on contact, what chemical in that exactly is doing it . . tehres got to be something we dont know about, but the money is in the treatment,a cure woudl mean all their customers go away!
I doubt they are holding off on a cure to be honest. We could try to hope though that the pharmaceutical companies develop a treatment where you could take a pill once a day that gave you NO outbreaks and NO asymptomatic shedding - to all intents and purposes a cure, but you have to keep buying and taking it and giving money to the companies to avoid the herpes symptoms. I think that there would be a bigger market than that than for Valtrex etc.
It's not that i woudn't like a cure and, i know this is unrelated, but when i went through a number of hopeless years fighting a yeast infection, which led to so many other things happening to me and also making me feel that death would be preferable and all i had were stupid doctors just saying "get some over the counter meds". That was until i found a doctor who enabled me to cure myself of my condition. Yet the doctor who helped me isn't recognised by the government health fund and i had to pay for it all out of my own pocket, when these other doctors who just wanted to push med's down me, i could get a rebate from visiting them? I dont see the sense in this, yet governments don't give a damn about doctors who come up with an end to certain illnesses and doctors/scientists will get discredited and called con men or it will be said that the cure is just a sham to get money. It only seems pharmaceutical meds get pushed at us. Look how long we were all conned into believing that antibiotics were good for everything. My gp used to hand them out like lollies for the common cold and anything and everything else b/c patients where none the wiser.
Now that some people have been overexposed to antibiotics, especially women, they end up with major yeast problems and now they just want to push tablets and creams at you, which half the time don't do anything b/c you are so infected with the candida. It's a never ending cycle of money making in my opinion and it's an issue very close to my heart as i've lived through it for a number of years and was pushed to feeling that death was the most preferable option. At least with herpes i can have "some" form of sexual relationship with my partner, but with the yeast infection it was zero "all the time".
Sorry for ranting, but when i see things which could be helped and seem so simple, yet nothing has been done about it at all, it really makes me mad.
I know what you mean about feeling all alone. I am only 18 and I have had herpes for about a year. However, please don't judge me because I am so young. I have only had sex with one person (who I am still with) and even though he gave it to me, he still doesn't understand what it is like to have an ob. Sometimes I just feel like I should have my whole life ahead of me, and yet the herpes stops me from doing what I really want to do in life. I think because I am so young that it makes it even harder to deal with. I know I am probably just feeling sorry for myself, but I just needed to vent a little bit. Thanks.
None of us are alone. There are millions of us sufferers out there. I just hope one day there is a cure, but the fact may be that it is not life threatening so why be in a hurry about it. (Just a thought) I hope that is not the case for us.
For the women...
Have any of you had children? My husband and I are looking forward to starting a family and it concerns me.
Cookie . . . I wouldnt judge, were all in the same boat. At 18 and thorough 21, I was not worried about all that safe sex stuff and I thought I could tell if someone was clean or not, or better yet expected honesty. I had sex with some very questionable people including a guy who worked at a club who later I found out I was one of many, many girls (nieve). Anyway later on in life at about 23, Im 26 now, I was with one guy in a searious relationship and well . . . you know how that goes he didnt know or didnt tell, and now I have it. Ive had it for 3 years. I always knew I was at risk when I was being careless and with the "questionable" guys, I didnt think I had anything to worry about this time, so it was a real eye opener for me. So no way would I judge, all it takes is ONE!
Thanks everyone for responding and letting me vent a little. It's true though, that is only takes one time. And now I am stuck with this forever. And all kidding aside, that is a long time. I'm not real sure how to deal with it. Not the ob's so much, but the emotional pain. I just feel dirty, even though I am in love and still with the guy who gave it to me in the first place. Anyway, I just wanted to say thanks for the positive feedback. It made me feel better.
There are a lot of things we get stuck with in life that we don't want. H is just one of those things. Just wait till you get older and see how much of this type of baggage you carry around. Still, there are so many good things to carry around, too. And the baggage you carry around, whatever it is, doesn't make you dirty.