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Old 02-09-2006, 10:17 AM   #1
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angelique5 HB User

Does anyone who lives with this know... can a person have the virus, and it lay dormant for YEARS, and then infect a monogomous partner later?

I've been with my husband for 15 years now... I've never cheated in any way shape or form(i was also a virgin when we met, so he's been my only partner EVER). About 2 and a half years ago, I had my first outbreak of sores... I have recurrances almost monthly, seems to be in sync with my periods... a few days before I start, I'll break out. We were having marital problems at that time, and for a couple years prior to that time, his fidelity was in question, but he's always denied it. I didn't have the courage to tell him about the sores until a few months ago (marriage is good again).

I was too afraid to see a doctor,or even talk to ANYONE about it, because of the implications...if they tell me it IS herpes, then I have to confront my fear, that my husband cheated on me.

or did he...and that's why my question today... to try to give the benefit of the doubt.... Could he have had this, and been completely asymptomatic, and it just flared up for him at that time, and I got it that way? He's still asymptomatic..he's never had a sore in his life... but I have them, and I really do believe it's herpes... it's always on the left side, on the labia majora, usually mild, maybe one sore, but that one is enough to bother me, they are often slightly itchy, and burn like hell when I use the restroom...this month though, I have about 3, and they're hurting something awful, and I'm finally so tired of it, I'm about ready to see a doctor...

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Old 02-09-2006, 11:40 AM   #2
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: California
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bbweckerley HB User
Re: Question...

Go see a doctor and settle this once and for all. The stress from not knowing must be causing wear on you and that's not good. So first find out if it's herpes and talk to your dr. about your concerns. You'll get lots of good info. and support on this board. Good luck!

Old 02-09-2006, 01:42 PM   #3
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angelique5 HB User
Re: Question...

I worked up the courage to call the doctor... they're getting me in this afternoon...

I know this isn't the end of the world... but I'm very humiliated by it all... :::deep breath:::


Old 02-09-2006, 07:11 PM   #4
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angelique5 HB User
Re: Question...

She wouldn't say by looking at it...but did a viral swab, and they'll call me by I wait a few more days.

She did prescribe something, hopefully it helps!

Old 02-10-2006, 05:49 AM   #5
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over21 HB User
Re: Question...

90% of the people who have herpes don't know it cause the symptoms are so mild they go unnoticed or misdiagnosed. Yes, you can go years and years and years without knowing you're hsv positive, it's very common.

If you're culture is negative you should follow up with and IgG type specific blood test. False negatives are common with cultures because of timing issues and/or there's just not enough of the virus present at that time.

Old 02-14-2006, 08:51 PM   #6
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Join Date: Feb 2006
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angelique5 HB User
Re: Question...

Well...i had to call them to find the results, but they said the culture was negative.

I do have to say I'm not 100% convinced... not that i WANT it to be positive...but now I have to make another dr's appt to discuss why else I might be having outbreaks, almost monthly, for the last 3 years. I think I'm definately going to ask about the IgG blood test... if the antibody isn't there, then I KNOW it's negative.

Thanks for you responses during all my confusion!

Old 02-17-2006, 11:05 PM   #7
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: MD
Posts: 1,457
backpacker HB Userbackpacker HB User
Re: Question...

You can get a false negative, so you may want to be retested. Trust your gut feelings. Drs often give misinformation on this disease. (And females' outbreaks often occur in sync with the menstrual cycle--mine do.)

After several years reading posts on this board, I want to corroborate what over21 said: many many people either have no symptoms for many years, or have such mild symptoms that they explain it away as muscle strain, jock itch, yeast infections, etc. Almost anything can happen with this virus.

Good luck! And keep reading posts here. This site has helped me understand herpes more than any book or dr ever has.

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