i've only just got it and i'm a bit scared.... - Herpes Message Board

perfectlybroken · 08-27-2006, 06:25 AM

hi, i got herpes two weeks ago from a one night stand...i'm not sure if he knew he had it or not but i'm pretty angry none-the-less...anyway ive been reading all the posts and they've scared me a bit...i'm scared of having more outbreaks and of passing it on to people...i'm really in limbo at the moment, hearing people say they have outbreaks every week and knowing that even if i use protection in the future i still might pass it on to someone is scaring me...how do you tell people? is stress the thing that brings it back? i'd love to hear how people have coped etc....thanks

also i was wandering how you know or can tell the first signs of an outbreak...i know they'll be milder than the first which is good as i had it quite bad but i only really knew there was something wrong when it started hurting when i went to the toilet....

CloudySkies · 08-27-2006, 01:16 PM

Hello PerfectlyBroken,

Though I've not been on this forum long I've been learning much about this virus. Some of the people here seem to be a tremendous source of strength, support and guidance. I myself am now playing the waiting game - my test results don't come back until mid next week, but I don't have a good feeling about it. I've basically convinced myself it's herpes because I know my body and I've done the reading and have talked to more than one Dr. and support helpline and I just don't know what else this could be???

Can I ask you how long your bumps/sores lasted (pending you had them)....from the time they first began to appear to when they were healed and basically gone? When you say you didn't notice anything until you went to the bathroom, what were your symptoms?

I have the same questions as you when it comes to how do you tell people you have this virus, as I'm in a new relationship this past 2 weeks and he's already so very special to me. Yes I realize it could have very well been this man who's passed herpes on to me if that's what it is I indeed have, but what's done is done and if that is what's going on, I'm sure he didn't know and I can't judge him for it either. If it was this new man in my life that's passed herpes on to me, that would mean I began having physical symptoms (bumps/sores) within 4-5 days after our first sexual contact and I don't know how likely that is...so now I'm terrified that if I do have herpes, not only how to tell this person but if he doesn't have it or didn't have it, then I've now exposed him to it. :O(

I too would also like to know how one can tell or feel when you're about to have another o/b?? I would very much appreciate hearing from those who know about this virus and have had experience with recurring outbreaks. What should one likely expect? Can a fever/chills/body aches be symptoms first, before the bumps/sores begin to develop? For that matter, when you have an o/b is there always presence of the sores and if so, do you have them first and then fever/chills, etc? Is there any kind of method to the madness of this virus?????

perfectlybroken · 08-27-2006, 05:35 PM

hi, thanks for replying, basically i had sex on the sunday night and by the next weekend something wasn't right but i just put it down to friction pains, i noticed a little sore but thought nothing of it until the monday when it became so painful to pee [stinging] i was almost in tears...i noticed more sores and went to see my gp on the wed who said it was more than likey herpes but the test results havent even come back [a week and a half later]...she gave me aciclovir and some anaesthetic cream to numb the sores and they were gone in 5 days... i didnt get any other symptoms such as flu-like feelings but my glands in my groin were up and tender. i did realise though that i probably had sores earlier on but it was only when they burst that it hurt to pee...

i'm only 22 and the guy i got it off is only 18 and i cant get in touch with him so i need to talk to him about it whether he knew something was wrong or not he needs to know he's infecting people...

i spoke to one of my friends about how or when to tell potential partners and we figured that if someone was that commited it shouldn't make too much of a difference but its still not nice to know you could infect someone you like and if they're in as much pain as i was i'd feel awful and if you're boyfriend infected you i'm sure he'd feel just as bad and would want the same questions answered...?

when the doctor told me what it probably was i cried for about half an hour to her and luckily she was really supportive, as were my friends but i felt i needed to talk to people who knew exactly what i was going through...the initial feeling dirty and not knowing what would happen but i think you're right that the people on this board seems really supportive which is a great relief.

i hope you are ok...apparently one of the best thing for herpes is not to stress too much! and i hope someone can answer all our questions...

Ornament · 08-28-2006, 09:55 AM

Welcome to this board both of you.....In order to get the answers that you both are looking for. I suggest out go back out to the main page of herpes and in the upper right side (by the page numbers) you'll see a "search box". Type in words like...telling, stress, etc. it will pull up other/older threads with recomendations to learning to deal with this. Keep in mind in the beginning - it is a "rollercoaster" of emotions. Read and learn as much as you can, this will truly be your salvation! But believe it or not - it DOES get easier with time. Keep in mind, no sense in stressing about it, because it really isn't going to change anything anyway.

-shinyOrn

CloudySkies · 08-28-2006, 11:51 AM

Thank you so much for the advice and kind words. I have not yet rec’d my results back from the culture I had taken this past Thursday morning, but as of this morning, I’m sure I have the virus; even if the culture comes back negative. Saturday evening I began feeling body aches with chills again (not sure if I had a fever but assuming I did). I had also noticed a bit of a red spot (that was not a bump) close to the very first bump that appeared last Tuesday night. Yesterday around noon I examined the area again and the red blemish was now slightly raised though was not tender to touch. Then last night I was definitely having uncomfortable tingling/crawling type sensations around the vaginal and anal area (and still am today). This morning that new mark is now a bump that seems to be forming a sore on the top and is now tender to touch…not only that, but it feels as though I’ve been kicked on the left side/butt area AND while showering this morning I was lathering up and accidentally scratched what felt like a little bump on the inside of my left thigh just under the buttock cheek (which did not realize was there until that moment). Almost immediately it was itchy after I had rubbed/scratched over it.…not 20 mins later the area was more like a rash with about 3-4 tiny little bumps right beside each other!!!! I clearly have the herpes virus and if I wasn’t 100% sure before, I am now. :O(

I was told by one of the Dr.’s in emergency the other day that has expertise on this virus that even a culture can come back negative after scraping or taking a swab. He said when taking the swab/culture the fluid from the blisters (before or immediately after they break open) must be present for a positive result. Being that the swab was taken when I had 2 spots that were already open sores (crater like center) and the other two at that time were only just red little bumps, I was told that there’s a strong likelihood the result will come back negative…which does not mean that it is a true “negative” result.

I have an appt. to see one of the Dr.’s in my family physicians office after work today and am going to specifically request the blood work be taken to test for this virus. I was told by another on this site that if I have blood work taken right now and if that comes back negative, than it’s pretty much a guarantee that this would then be a recent exposure if the antibodies are not showing yet, whether my culture comes back positive or not. Is this true?