Yes it would be scary, but being honest is best, at least he will respect you for that. I asked my current partner on two seperate occasions about STD's or anything else i should know about and he said he had nothing and that he was totally safe. At the time herpes was the last thing on my mind and i knew nothing about genital herpes, all i was worried about was HIV. I must have led a very sheltered life as the first time i'd heard of genital herpes was when the reality tv show Big Brother started and soon after the genital herpes adverts came onto tv. Before that the only thing i knew of herpes was the cold sores you get on your mouth area.
Two years into the relationship when he finally got another o/b he was forced to tell me that he now remembers he has herpes. I was upset and did think "what else is he hiding", but it's hard to simply leave somebody after two years and all esle was fine with our relationship. I figured i'd rather stay with him and catch herpes as he has most of the qualities i would want in a partner.
Your situation is different as you have only been on two dates. If this guy truly loves and respects you he wont push you for sex straight away, this should give you a bit of time to work up the courage to tell him.
A lot of relationships where there are no herpes issues end up breaking up after a short time, so if the non herpes carrier isn't certain about the future of the relationship they may bail out due to not wanting to catch herpes if they are uncertain of the relationship lasting. So at the end of the day if he decides to move on it wont necessarily be b/c of the herpes, but that he wasn't sure of the relationship itself. In all honesty, if you were in his shoes and not 100% certain how you felt about the other person, would you run the risk of catching herpes? Most of us would say no, but as you can see on the Happy Couples thread, a lot of couples have stayed together b/c they felt right for each other and the herpes was not an issue.
Best of luck and i hope you post some good news about your situation soon