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Old 01-02-2008, 06:03 PM   #1
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Michigan
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eoj70 HB User
Do's & Do not's

Hi I am a 37 yr old male who was just diagnosed 2 weeks ago, not sure 1 or 2 but it's down below.
I have read the handbook but still have questions.

Is there a specific list of do’s and don’ts? The info out there seems to be censored for delicate ears, but many of us out here want to know. Is there a website that offers this info or an old thread here I can look-up?

My Dr was not much help, he just said wear a condom and watch for outbreaks...

 
Old 01-02-2008, 06:57 PM   #2
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: MB Canada
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catharine101 HB User
Re: Do's & Do not's

Do:

1. Wear a condom
2. Understand that wearing a condom is not 100% guaranteed to prevent the spread of the virus
3. Make sure you inform any/all sexual partners of your herpes status, regarless of how long it's been since you've had an outbreak. You can still transfer the virus, even if you haven't shown a symptom for years.
4. Try your best to live a normal life. For most people, it's not that hard, as the herpes outbreaks aren't all that common - usually only a few times a year.
5. Find out if you have HSV1 or HSV2

Don't:

1. Have skin to skin contact with the affected area during an outbreak, unless your partner has the same type of herpes you do (assuming anyone would want to have contact during an outbreak)
2. Freak out over tranmission methods. It's skin on skin - transfer via towels, razors etc. isn't going to happen
3. Stress out

It's all pretty basic really. Once you're diagnosed, it's simply a matter of figuring out how it's going to affect you, and then not letting if affect you an overt amount.

 
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Old 01-03-2008, 03:46 PM   #3
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Re: Do's & Do not's

Hi Catherine,
Thanks for the reply. I did contact my Dr today and it's HSV2.
Can you elaborate on the skin to skin coment?
Any part of my skin to any part of her skin - I'm assuming that's an extreme and not to worry but what about my affected area (not durring an outbreak) to various parts of her skin? Hands? Chest? other?
What about the areas near my affected area? Legs, butt, abs, etc.
I really don't want to tell her "Oh, its OK to do this or that (non-penetration)" and then findout later that I was wrong and I passed this along.

Perhaps like many here, I'm sweating the details too much, but as we've all found out it's better to be safe than sorry.
Thanks again

 
Old 01-03-2008, 05:55 PM   #4
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catharine101 HB User
Re: Do's & Do not's

Skin on skin -

You have genital herpes. It lives in the nerve endings, and can be present anywhere in the boxer shorts area. So, while you have an outbreak especially, don't allow any contact with that area (oral or genital contact) The reason condom's aren't 100% is because the virus is in the whole boxer shorts area - a condom doesn't cover that whole space - thus contact with that area COULD spread the virus, even when you're not having an outbreak. The chances of her getting the virus from contact when you aren't having an outbreak, with no condom, is about 9% per year.

Try downloading the Herpes Handbook by Terri Warren. Lots of good info for Newbie's!

 
Old 01-03-2008, 07:14 PM   #5
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eoj70 HB User
Re: Do's & Do not's

Yep, I've down loaded it and read it. It does have some good info, but obviously not everything.
Either I'm dumb, paranoid or it's just not there - If I 'm NOT having an out break on my penis (which is where it showed up) is it safe for her to touch it with her hand, breast or other body part?

 
Old 01-03-2008, 08:09 PM   #6
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: MB Canada
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catharine101 HB User
Re: Do's & Do not's

Safe is your operative word here. Herpes lives either orally or genitally, as you know. So yes, she could touch you with any part of her body (other than her mouth or genitals) and be ok - provided she didn't then touch any part of herself. Thing is, when you are being intimate such that her hands etc. are touching you, you don't usually break off to go wash your hands right away, right??

The chances of her getting the virus by transferrance like this are really low. Generally it needs to be direct contact with the area. But it can and has happened. So is it 100% safe... No. Nothing is. BUT, is it likely to happen. No.

The unfortunate thing is that you can't tell when you are shedding - so you must consider yourself contagious at all times, even though you technically aren't. As I said before, her chances of getting the virus during unprotected sex with no other preventative measures is 9% PER YEAR. That's pretty darn low. Condoms help reduce that even more. But just one time with a condom can transfer the virus.

So is it safe?? You decide. It could happen. It could happen tomorrow. It could happen 20 years from now. It may never happen.

 
Old 01-04-2008, 03:35 PM   #7
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eoj70 HB User
Shedding

Thanks again...
This brings up my next question what is shedding and how is it different from an outbreak?

 
Old 01-04-2008, 04:32 PM   #8
Senior Veteran
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: MB Canada
Posts: 757
catharine101 HB User
Re: Shedding

Shedding is when the virus is active in your nerve cells, but not causing an outbreak. The cells surface through your skin when you're shedding, and you are contagious. When you aren't shedding you aren't contagious - but there is no way of telling when you are shedding.

An outbreak is when you are showing symptoms - and you are also very contagious at this point.

Last edited by catharine101; 01-04-2008 at 04:34 PM.

 
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