I know. I'm wondering if there are anymore people out there who want to add their positive stories to this thread! My boyfriend and I are still going stong and life is good.
Any happy couples out there, feel free to share your thoughts!
I've just caught up on this thread and i agree that it should be kept at the top.
The person i was seeing didn't tell me that he had Type 2 until he had an OB, and this OB was his first in a 10 year period. I was a bit shocked and did initially feel cheated as i felt that if a person knows they have this condition that they ought to tell somebody prior to being intimate with them. Regardless of him not telling me, i wanted to continue the relationship as he means so much to me and i couldn't imagine life without him.
I had the Western Block blood test, which i'm told is supposed to be accurate and i came up negative. To be honest, i was relieved as i didn't know anything about H. I didn't tell him that i'd had the blood test as i didn't want him to feel that i viewed him in a bad light, which i didn't. I wanted to continue being intimate with him, regardless of H. I wasn't concerned either as i naively thought "Herpes, big deal!!, we'll just abstain when he gets and OB and towards the end of the OB, just use condoms"..............Anyway, with his first OB in 10 years occuring, we decided to use a condom. The OB was virtually finished and you coudln't really see anything. Two months later i got my first OB. Now the odd thing is that from the blood test to his OB, we didn't have sex due to both of our work schedules. So i would agree with the theory that condoms don't save you from H. The experts say "use a condom", but his OB was in an area covered by the condom (partway up the shaft) and my OB was right next to my anal area (sorry to be so graphic!!). We didn't have anal sex either, so i'm wondering how on earth it's possible to get it in that spot? Not that i'm complaing, i'd rather have it at the anal area than vaginal.
So basically, the points i meant to raise were....... 1)Condoms don't protect you....2) it is possible to love somebody and continue being intimate after you know they have H............3) and from reading all the posts, it appears that men seem to get the least OB or none at all. My partner has only had 5 in 20yrs. Maybe it's due to the physical makeup of women's genitals and it being a lot moister and delicate in that region, womens hormonal changes each month, women generally stressing more about kids, deadlines, schedules, whereas males tend to be more generally laid back creatures (don't get me wrong, am not bagging males, just my observation of most males i've know, they tend to be such relaxed creatures, whereas women run about thinking everything has to be clean, perfect, in order etc)
I'm sorry you got h, Audrey-B, but your story ends up well and your points are well-taken. It seems to me that we are always hearing that the virus is shed around the genital region, not just within the 1/4-inch area of an ob--and that the shedding would be highest during an ob, even a days'-old ob. I don't mean all down your legs and up to your waist, just in the few-inches area near your ob. So some virus could easily be shed near the anus or around a man's testicles, which kind of brush your anal area in certain positions. Perhaps that is why you got it there. Also, recall that the virus can live longer in a warm, moist medium. Think: sex goo dripping and smearing around your vaginal/anal area. If the virus can be cultured from a moist towel hours after you've used it briefly to wipe your crotch, certainly it could be cultured from the wet stuff that's been moving around the area during sex. I don't mean that it travels in semen or in vaginal fluids in general, but that if it is already present, like near a sore, and the virus gets in the moistness, and the moistness gets smeared, the virus will be carried.
Your story also illustrates the need to wait a couple days after an ob has completely disappeared before having sex, no matter what precautions you use.
I think you are right about most men, although there are exceptions. My ex, who drinks addictively and doesn't eat well hardly ever gets ob's (at least, he used to--I don't really discuss it with him now!), but some men here on the board have a real hard time. And, yeah, we women are always in flux, always adjusting, so it seems logical that the virus would take advantage of a weak time in our cycles.
It's funny, serialnovelist, I kind of fantasize sometimes about meeting a guy with Herpes. I would love it if someone sat me down and said "there's something I need to tell you" before I had to.
I think about that all the time, I would be the happiest person ever if someone said that to me. Ive been here all night reading these posts. Im so depressed right now thinking about the guy Im dating, and when I have to tell him what I got. Im stressing myself out over it and want to tell him so much, but it is wayyy to early for me to. I never think about this, it's not an issue to me until a guy comes my way. And now he has, and I really am starting to like him, and just so worried.
These posts are great!!
Thanks backbacker for bumping it up!!!. I'm not really sure what bumping it did because it was still on page 17 or 18 on the Happy Couples thread (yes, I read ALL of them!!lol) and there are all sooo insiring!!
My boyfriend of 3.5 years has been soooo amazing! I guess you could call him my soul mate!!! When I got HPV, he was so supportive and helpful in all ways. My HPV is extreamly low. I had a loop surgery done(removed a chunk of my cervix to remove the abnormal cells and prevent the virus from spredding) and i've been negative on my pap smears for almost 3 years! They say that after your 2nd negative pap smear that you body has pretty much fought (sp?) off the virus, so i'm soo happy when I thought everything was going perfect....then.... I was contracted with HSV 1 genitally. Before I knew it was type 1 i was devastated. I thought that he wouldnt whant to be with me. I thought that I may have gotten it from a non agreeable sexual situation that happend on a terrible night before I met him. I though he would not want to be with me anymore! boy was I sooo wrong!! He says to me (as I begin to tear while typing ) I love you becuase of whats in here and here ( my head and my heart) not because of whats going on anywhere else. When he said that to me, I was like .."wow! i think i'm probably one of the luckiest girls in the world!!" (i'm all facklemt!!) I have this new strong love and appreciation for him.
Recently I thought that maybe I was having an OB but I wasnt sure because I didnt have any simptoms but I had one tiny red spot and a cut on the top of my vagina, that could have been from sex. I told him this ( that I think I either was having an OB or my initial OB was still lingure), but he says to me "Do you want it?" And I said, "not if its going to hurt you" and he said "If you want it, and I want it (sex), than I dont care. From what I know, were going to be together forever anyways"
god!! I love him so much!!!!
Take care everyone and I hope and to all you guys out there who have H, just think! there are men outthere who are willing to put themselves at risk to be with the person they are in love with so dont feel ashamed or bad if you have it because others are willingly putting themselves at risk!!
I am glad that you shared your story. For those who read her testimony, please believe me that that particular situation can happen to you, too. There are people out there, who may or may not be infected with H or anything else, who are willing to love you for you.
I did not believe this until I went through a changing experience, very similar to gerrysgirl. Mine was not as smooth and took a few years to evolve too, but the wait was worth it because devotion and friendship stood above the other issues.
Congrats to all those that have found a partner! To all those who are turning over a new leaf, the best thing you can do is continue to love yourself and boost your self esteem. When you see yourself as more than a skin condition, eventually someone will, too.
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