Recently diagnosed with herpes and I can't believe it... - Herpes Message Board

vanillacupcake · 03-18-2009, 07:36 PM

So I have recently been diagnosed and it doesn't seem real to me.
I have had sex with one person who had only one cold sore many years ago. He has no symptoms whatsoever and here I am suffering like I've never suffered before. I feel like he is going to leave me even though he gave this to me(we think it happened thru oral) and has no symptoms. Maybe he should leave me. I have no one to talk to because I don't want to tell anyone.
I have just recently moved out and started living on my own which was stressful and this just adds more stress to my life. I feel so dumb...i never thought this would happen to me. I'm in so much pain and I cried nonstop and right when the doctor told me I began crying and didn't stop until the next day.
I'm so depressed...my life wasn't suppose to be like this. I know millions of people have it but I feel so alone. I feel like I should never have sex again. I feel like my life is ruined. I feel like no matter what I do it will be in the back of my mind and I will never feel normal again. The shame I feel is overwhelming. What would my parents think? My sister? My friends? I just want to wake up from this nightmare.
I don't know if I sound like I'm over exaggerating but I just need to get my feelings out because I have no one to talk to.

JKjnr · 03-18-2009, 08:17 PM

It is unfair isn't it to get it like that. I got it from kissing a person who had recovered from an outbreak - and it only surfaced months later - real bad. I had 17 lesions all over my face. And was very unwell. Then my doctor got me on high dose Famvir for 5 days. Relief in two days and never looked back. Famvir is expensive true - but you can get it online from off shore much cheaper (just take care choosing). I have stocked up!!. Hope your relationship matters get better. JK

jill60 · 03-19-2009, 01:34 AM

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. I do know someone that has herpes & they did tell me that when they 1st found they had it, that with each out break they have they go longer between outbreaks. (hope that makes sense) She also says she can tell when she is going to have a outbreak before any signs appear. With all the different meds they have now that should help & also I would think you shouldn't have to tell your family.
Jill

Quote:

Originally Posted by vanillacupcake

So I have recently been diagnosed and it doesn't seem real to me.
I have had sex with one person who had only one cold sore many years ago. He has no symptoms whatsoever and here I am suffering like I've never suffered before. I feel like he is going to leave me even though he gave this to me(we think it happened thru oral) and has no symptoms. Maybe he should leave me. I have no one to talk to because I don't want to tell anyone.
I have just recently moved out and started living on my own which was stressful and this just adds more stress to my life. I feel so dumb...i never thought this would happen to me. I'm in so much pain and I cried nonstop and right when the doctor told me I began crying and didn't stop until the next day.
I'm so depressed...my life wasn't suppose to be like this. I know millions of people have it but I feel so alone. I feel like I should never have sex again. I feel like my life is ruined. I feel like no matter what I do it will be in the back of my mind and I will never feel normal again. The shame I feel is overwhelming. What would my parents think? My sister? My friends? I just want to wake up from this nightmare.
I don't know if I sound like I'm over exaggerating but I just need to get my feelings out because I have no one to talk to.

nvragain · 03-20-2009, 01:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vanillacupcake

So I have recently been diagnosed and it doesn't seem real to me.
I have had sex with one person who had only one cold sore many years ago. He has no symptoms whatsoever and here I am suffering like I've never suffered before. I feel like he is going to leave me even though he gave this to me(we think it happened thru oral) and has no symptoms. Maybe he should leave me. I have no one to talk to because I don't want to tell anyone.
I have just recently moved out and started living on my own which was stressful and this just adds more stress to my life. I feel so dumb...i never thought this would happen to me. I'm in so much pain and I cried nonstop and right when the doctor told me I began crying and didn't stop until the next day.
I'm so depressed...my life wasn't suppose to be like this. I know millions of people have it but I feel so alone. I feel like I should never have sex again. I feel like my life is ruined. I feel like no matter what I do it will be in the back of my mind and I will never feel normal again. The shame I feel is overwhelming. What would my parents think? My sister? My friends? I just want to wake up from this nightmare.
I don't know if I sound like I'm over exaggerating but I just need to get my feelings out because I have no one to talk to.

You will make it through this, I know it seems impossible right now but you will.

And you are not alone. Our stories are much alike. Husband got streep throat and cold sores broke out...didn't think anything of it. He was starting to feel better and we had sex one night. No oral. Somehow got transmitted from his mouth to hand to me. Well, within two weeks, I was starting to have problems 'down there' thought maybe I have a yeast infection...went to the dr's and the swab came back positive for herpes.My world was turned up side down. Blood tested positive for Type I. Dr was puzzled and tested blood again @ next pap. Again, Type I only. VERY common to have.....very uncommon where I was getting it. Talk about feeling unlucky.

Yes, it is very very painful. I had just given birth 8 weeks prior and would rather do that a hundred times. Hard both physicly and emotionly, you are not over exaggerating anything....I felt all of that, too. I got Valtrex and some pain meds from the dr and it cleared up.

That was October 2007. I have not had ANY problems since then...NONE...and I haven't taken anything, either. No meds, nothing.

So hopefully I have gotten lucky in a very unlucky situation.

As far as other people knowing (sister, ect.).....If you are worried about what they would think of you, why do they need to know? I don't want everyone to know my business down there. (sexual partners need to know, of course) Tell them (friends, family) and talk to them for support if you want.....but I don't feel the need to tell them as an FYI....does that make sense?

Hang in there, you will make it. You are not alone. I know it's hard...been there done that. You have my thoughts and my ears to talk to.

He shouldn't leave you...he should support you.

Don't know if this will help any.....if anything, know you are not alone.

vanillacupcake · 03-20-2009, 10:26 PM

thank you very much for your kind words
i really need them in a time like this
i'm slowly coming to terms with this but i still...i dont know
i still feel like i'll never feel pretty or sexy again
i look around at other people and think "they probably don't have herpes...but i do"
i feel like i dont want to have sex ever again...i wouldnt want to put someone through this and i dont even feel like i can...i feel like i shouldnt even be touched.