How do I Cope - Herpes Message Board

Broken35 · 06-25-2009, 03:31 PM

I found out I have herpes. Married only 8 months and I found out first through some blood work I had drawn going tomorrow so I can ask my Dr. A lot of questions I was in perfect health before I married 8 months ago. My husband has been untruthful about alot of things so that is why I went to have blood drawn and came back positive how do I cope with this my soon to be x husband will not tell me his results he stated he would show me his lab results as soon as they came back but he has been avoiding my phone calls won't tell me what his results say which I know in my heart he gave it to me but i guess I want closure for him to admit that he gave this to me what is the odds of me going to the doctor every year for my annual exam with primary Doctor and pap with OBGYN and I have been negitive with every blood std test i have taken since 18 years old i am now 35 and as soon as i get married to someone who is a liar and unfaithful which found out after I said i do and i asked him before we were married if he was current with his std test etc...he said yes and then after I say i do 8months later i find out i have herpes and he tells me he has not been to see a dr. for a check up or std testing for 8 years...what is the odds of me having this and him not. I just don't understand I think i am annoyed by the fact that he is not willing to share his results with me that should tell me right there he is positive but just won't admit it...as well as admit he was unfaithful during our marriage i am and need to know how do I cope. I tell myself i don't need to see his results because i already know then another part of me wants to see them and have him admit it...this is just a mess

B3achbabi · 06-25-2009, 09:24 PM

Well first off relax!

I'll share my story, i've been dating this guy a few months,of course one thing lead to another we ended up having sex multiple times after a few months and suddenly a month later he tells me he is herpes positive. i was shocked, upset, and down right ****ed off. I still am not sure what im going to do, other than that he is the man of my dreams but its still hard for me to accept it. But none the less, ive thought about it numerous times and decided to stand by him. It is dificult finding out news like this, im currently upset because im trying to get him to take valtrex to protect me somewhat but im not sure if he will.But it was really hard for him to tell me. But do realize its not the end of the world, you deserve way better than someone who can't be faithful, and you will find someone

herpes isnt a death sentence just a pest. I personally have not been tested yet but have showed no signs, but dont stress, it triggers an OB!

Broken35 · 07-02-2009, 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by B3achbabi

Well first off relax!

I'll share my story, i've been dating this guy a few months,of course one thing lead to another we ended up having sex multiple times after a few months and suddenly a month later he tells me he is herpes positive. i was shocked, upset, and down right ****ed off. I still am not sure what im going to do, other than that he is the man of my dreams but its still hard for me to accept it. But none the less, ive thought about it numerous times and decided to stand by him. It is dificult finding out news like this, im currently upset because im trying to get him to take valtrex to protect me somewhat but im not sure if he will.But it was really hard for him to tell me. But do realize its not the end of the world, you deserve way better than someone who can't be faithful, and you will find someone

herpes isnt a death sentence just a pest. I personally have not been tested yet but have showed no signs, but dont stress, it triggers an OB!

Thanks for sharing your story. Have you been tested yet. My soon to be x husband still has not gone to be tested since i found out first that I have the HSV 2 herpes. We only been married for 9 months now and this along with some other lies he told me after we said I do has broken our marriage appart exspecially the Herpes shock. I know he gave it to me. Had a surgery back in Jan of this year and I was fine..now just out of the blue I have herpes....I think he already knows he has it because before we were married i asked him when was the last time he had annual physical/ blood work for std done he stated he had just went and was current...then when I pop up with herpes through a blood test they did at the doctor because my blood pressure was up due to all the stress he was putting me through i had them run std herpes all std test on me and then they tell me I am positive for herpes. I then asked my husband tell me the truth when was your last time going to the doctor for blood work and he told me 8 years...I was like are you kidding me ...why would you lie about something like that before you get married unless you knew you already had it and just figured it would go away. I am not shocked anymore I am just down right ****ed off i am going through the motions right now I cry then i get mad then I cry more then I get even more ****ed then I try to calm down because I hear stress cause a outbreak but kinda hard when you just found out and your marriage is over.