Hope, living with HSV2
I thought my life was over when I found out in June '12. I was infected by someone who knew he had it, while on a break from my current boyfriend of 2 years. I lost 3 friends over the news. One of them I had been friends with for 20 years, another for 10. My whole world came crashing down. For 15 years I had used my body and sex as a way to make myself feel better about whatever it was that I hated. Sex was my outlet. I was usually safe but having casual encounters didn't bother me, i enjoyed it. After i found out my whole outlook changed. It was a hard summer. Not only did I lose friends but they stayed friends with the person who gave it to me because they accused ME of lying about it. My typical way of dealing with things wldve been to act out sexually but that was not an option. I felt dirty, and gross. Ashamed even. It takes a little while to process. While I was going through my abstinence I was able to just watch, to watch my friends, people, see how it looks. During this time I watched my friends live in this 'party house', they all passed each other around. As i became educated and dealt with my issues I realized how sacred and intimate sex is and how this young generation does not value it at all. These people, guys and girls, did not use protection. I ended up telling almost all of them about me, (Im older and more the 'mother' type). I educated them the best I could abt being safe about diseases. I would bring condoms over. I dont think i did much good but sometime in the future they might think back to it.
I have figured that I was lucky to not have contracted anything more serious in my years of not caring. I have spent some serious time thinking about it. Genital Herpes is really not that bad. Yes it can be passed easily but not if you take care. One I care about myself more. Two I know who cares about me. Three it is just a skin condition that i dont even have to deal with that often. I get to hide it, no one has to know when im having an outbreak. With oral afflictions everyone can see it, and it is easier to pass, thats why LOTS of people have it. Luckily I get to wear undies and hide it. Its uncomfortable and hurts when u have one but thats ALL it is. Untreated nothing worse will happen, no cancer, no other serious issues like some other STIs. This is something you can catch no matter how careful you are. STIs like chlamydia and such can typical only be caught without a condom and can cause SERIOUS issues and u cld not know you have it.
Life goes on. It sucks and some days are worse than others. Having an OB is the worse but they go away.
Luckily the bf that I was on a break with loved me enough to look past the mistake I made while we were not together and we have been back together for 2 months now. He still has not caught it and I hope he never does but he sees it as not a big deal. I have looked at it as a good thing and I have been honest with A LOT of ppl abt it. Because people shld be aware that it is not as 'dirty' as they think. That lots of normal, clean, healthy people have it. its hard to adjust to but in the long run it makes us love US more.