Need support after the talk
I have been on this forum since I was 24, I am now 29. I have given advice or asked for it. Well today I am looking for support. I recently started dating online after a long 4 year relationship. I knew that whoever I date and though of becoming sexual with would have to endure the "talk." I always get neverous but I am confident when I do it and state ever fact I know about it and how to keep someone as safe as possible. Well I've been dating this guy for 3 months, he live 6hrs away and he came to visit me. Things got really hot but we did not have sex, just touching and rubbing with clothing on. I thought this might become sexual soon so I decided to talk to him about me having herpes. Of all the years of having this I never know what to expect from people....
He got really quiet. He said this is a "hard one to swallow" and that he didn't know what to say. I covered every basis with him, plus he is a nurse so I know he is well informed.... From there he said that since we were so far away us seeing eachother would be very expensive but prior to me telling him, he'd said we could work this all out and he'd want to see me on a monthly basis. I asked him if that meant he just wanted to be friends and he said he didn't know what to say.
I am getting the sense that he doesn't want to deal with it, which I understand. I had planned to go see him in about 2 weeks but now I am thinking I should cancel my flight. Ideally I would like to hear him tell me directly if he wants to see where this goes or not. I guess I should take what he said above as a clue?
Despite me knowing that this is a part of having herpes, it still doesn't feel good to think that someone doesn't want to get to know you anymore because of an STD. I guess I am seeking support from folks here because this forum has helped me get through some of my toughest years. I appreciate any words of encouagement or support.