I hope you guys can help here because i am so afraid of getting tested. My ex-girlfriend got tested and she says the resut was negative but she didnt show it to me because of the respect we lost to each other. She told me that even her mom can not access her health reports. I hope she doesnt lie.
My story is.. I was with a nice girl during the summer. Our relationship started last June and lasted till end of August. Well, we had sex like normal people but the condom broke many times and sometimes we didnt care about it and kept on going (i know its stupid, but we are human beings). I was avare of STDs and HIV so i asked her about her status and she told me that nothing is wrong with her and her last pap came normal. SO i trusted her because i loved her. Anyway, end of August she went back to her college and because of long distance our relationship didnt continue much. Now its December and last week i suddenly became afraid of AIDS because of so many commercials on the TV, busses.... So, i checked the symptoms on the net and in just 3 days everything started:
Last week during the finals week i was so dizzy for a whole week. I never felt this way before. I was so light-headed and dizzy. Yesterday dizziness stopped finally. However, yesterday night i accidentaly touched
my neck and found swollen lymph nodes on the left side. I am not sure if they were there before but they freak me out. (Actually i dont know for sure what you mean by swollen. You cant see anything on the mirror but when you touch it there is soemething.) So, now i am freaked out and feel like every part of my body hurts and especially the lefy side of my enck and shoulders. (I carried some luggages yesterday maybe thats why?)
Its been more than 2-4 weeks now. So, can these be ARS related? I dont have the courage to get tested. I dont think that i can continue to live its positive. I also understand people who have AIDS much better now and will do whatever it takes to help them. They had the courage to get tested. They weren't cowards like me.
So, what do you think are these ARS symptoms? Its been more than 2-4 weeks now. I didnt have sex since the end of August and just started to feel this dizziness and neck pain.
hello notfair,
there are many people on this board that have been in your shoes, the can't seem to get the courage to get tested ones. you need to know that no one thinks they have the courage, but they do it, just like you are going to. we all have a reason to believe that we were exposed at one time or another, some due to higher risk activities, but some just because of cases like yours. i am not going to lie and tell you that it is impossible for you to be positive, how the hell do i know? but i can tell you that it is unlikley. i am not sure what brand of condoms you were using, but let us know so we will never by them as so many seemed to break on you! anyway, let me tell you from first hand knowledge that if you think you are positive, your body will act that way, and so the cycle begins. i freaked myself out so badly that i am still on anxiety medication. i actually got very very sick after the birth of my son and the infection that i got was related to people with full blown AIDS or Leukiemia. normally healthy people don't get it, well, like 1 in 50,000. i was that 50,000. even after all that, i was convinced that i was HIV positive and looking around on the internet did not help AT ALL!!!!!! i was just about back in the hospital because of a nervous breakdown when i looked at my son and cried and cried. i was sure i was going to die, and he would die to. i got tested, and when they took the blood i felt this weight lift. i was finally going to be free. you know, the truth shall set you free...all that....
it came back negative and i cried and cried again, but out of joy. i live everyday differently now, i love everything about each day. i had unprotected sex with 10 different people over 10 years, so you can see why i was worried.
i urge you to get tested, i urge you to talk to your doctor about this anxiety. i really think you are going to be ok, but don't live like you have the disease, get tested and go on with your life.
Thanks for the reply.
I really do not wish to know the test result. I prefer to die without knowing it. Its just soo unfair. People have sex with prostitutes or have alot of unprotected sex and are still healthy. On the other hand me.. first time unprotected sex and i asked her about her STD status before i had sex with her. Its soo unfair.
My question is: I read in alot of places that ARS symptoms occur in 2-4 weeks after you get the virus. I started to date her at june and started to have unprotected test at the begiining of July. My sexual relationship ended at the end of August. (we didnt have too much unprotected sex, but the damn condom broke many times and you just dont think about these things in the middle of making love.) Its end of December now. So isnt it late for ARS symptoms now? Please say yesss
In addition, how come paps dont show if you are infected or not? She got her cervix checked out many times because of her past cancer experience. She didnt have sex for 1 year until she met me at the beginning of june and she never felt any symtoms and still doesnt feel anything and says that she is negative for sure. Why wouldnt she show me her Health report? I soo much want to trust her.
I will go to sleep now. My left shoulder and alll around my shoulder hurts now for some reason. Its like a nightmare. Goodnight
"I really do not wish to know the test result. I prefer to die without knowing it."
That will NEVER happen. Even if you have HIV and choose not to be tested, one day HIV will turn into full blown AIDS, and you WILL be diagnosed, you will be told and you will know when you die that it was AIDS that killed you, so why not be tested now, and find out if all the worry is for nothing, or if it is not, than you can extend your life, and the quality of it.
"Its just soo unfair. People have sex with prostitutes or have alot of unprotected sex and are still healthy. On the other hand me.. first time unprotected sex and i asked her about her STD status before i had sex with her. Its soo unfair."
Nothing in life is fair. But that doesnt make it any easier. The only thing that will help you is to be tested.
"My question is: I read in alot of places that ARS symptoms occur in 2-4 weeks after you get the virus. So isnt it late for ARS symptoms now?"
Yes. Generally, in MOST cases of people who DO expierence ARS it occurs between 2 and 4 weeks. Some websites say as long as 8 weeks, but the one I found that said that was outdated a few years. So even if it IS possible to take up to 8 weeks, you are still WAY past the ARS time frame. It is too late for ARS from those encounters.
"In addition, how come paps dont show if you are infected or not?"
Pap smears are for cancer and abnormal cells, not HIV. HIV must be found through specific blood tests. And the reason she might want to keep her health report private really is her buisness. It could be that she has a history of health problems she does not want you to know, maybe STDs that she no longer carries, a pregnancy in the past, an abortion, or even something as simple as a herediatary problem she would rather not discuss. It is HER buisness only. But, as your partner she should feel free to DISCUSS with you any and all STD testing. Please bear in mind, she needed an HIV test, not just a pap smear and a check up to see if she had HIV, she needed a specific test looking for it. DO you know if she got one?
Trust is IMPORTANT in a relationship, but if you dont have it, AT LEAST be safe until you do.
i think that you are really being irrational about this........
don't you find it odd that you are already acting like you are infected? are you going to go the rest of your life not having sex for fear that the condom will break? knowing your HIV status is as importatnt today as good credit. you can't get very far without it.
the other person who replied to you, Maybe Helpful, she knows a lot about this stuff, ask her the statistics about HIV in America, she can also send you to some good web sites, but i think the more snooping you do on the net the worse of you will be.
like i said, we all have our stories, our reasons for being mortified to get tested, but we did and we are better off because of it.
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