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Old 01-21-2004, 09:56 PM   #1
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Exclamation HIV may not be 'Easy' to transmit, HOWEVER!!- Please read this story!

Hello everyone, In my thread "Anyone with HIV Acute diagnosis & rapid decrease in VL without treatment? Updated" Nyxin asked me if I would post my story of how I was infected. I did and she asked me to create this thread so everyone could read it. I believe it's a good educational idea.

MY STORY

This is a bit personal but I will give enough information to hopefully help out. And before I start Nyxin asked if this was a one-time exposure and could I have been infected by someone else before this and the answer is no, it was from this one-time exposure.

I was diagnosed in Aug 03' and previous to that I had tested negative back in July just prior to my exposure that infected me. I am certain about who gave it to me, although the how part is still and will forever remain a mystery. But I'm glad you asked because I think people do not realize that there is no such thing as "safe-sex". After what has happened to me I now rightfully call "safe-sex" - "safer-sex". I am a young gay man and had sex with someone I know, but not all that well, I suppose you can say. There was the usual foreplay and a small amount of oral sex for both of us. I didn't have any cuts or sores in my mouth at the time if your all curious. So the odds of it being oral are high.

Here is how I think it happened. We proceeded to have anal sex and I was the receptive one. Now this is where it gets interesting and tricky. I considered myself quite educated on STD's etc. and in fact had volunteered many times for HIV/AIDS programs. So I knew a good deal of info but I didn't know much about viral loads and that when they are high it is easier for someone with a high viral load to give the virus to someone else. Studies show that the higher the VL the higher the concentration of HIV in pre-*** and semen as well as blood.

So back to my exposure. When I was being receptive there was a good amount of pre-*** from the other person before he put on the condom. I didn't think about it at all, the fact that if there was high amounts of HIV in that fluid and after he put the condom on he touched the condom with his hands, so having this pre-*** fluid on the condom really makes it useless, since there is a high chance that I could have been infected by the pre-*** on the outside of the condom. Also, after we were done he took the condom off quickly and flushed it down the toilet. There is a possibility that it broke..?? So those are my two theories.

Of course after I found out I was positive I wanted to make sure that this person knew he was, (if he didn't already, which could be the case) some people are positive and don't care to disclose. I gave the appropriate people his contact info and they informed him. Since then I have not heard from him or seen him around like I used to before. So I am guessing he didn't know and is now dealing with HIV himself. The odds are though that he is not doing as well as me. Of course I don't want everyone to know my status in the community so I couldn't tell him myself. He may just have denied it and then told people about me. I was not willing to do that so the state took care of it for me and kept me anonymous.

Well,... I have spilled my guts.. LoL Actually, it feels good to tell the story. So a message to everyone, BE CAREFUL!, pre-*** itself can possibly infect you if it gets on the condom of someone HIV+. Take care all, be safeR, and happy '04.
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Old 01-21-2004, 11:27 PM   #2
dxh dxh is offline
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Re: HIV may not be 'Easy' to transmit, HOWEVER!!- Please read this story!

I am in a similar boat. I used protection as well except it was vaginal ( i am male) I am not sure that i am positive on paper but I get the results tomarrow and I know that my body is very different now and all of my lymph nodes are swollen and this crazy headache will not quit. Were you symptomatic while you were seroconverting if you dont mind me asking. I hope you continue to do well.

 
Old 01-22-2004, 02:07 AM   #3
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Re: HIV may not be 'Easy' to transmit, HOWEVER!!- Please read this story!

Dxh go and read poz's thread on rapid blah blah on viral load or something...

hey poz, i wore a condom too, damned!! i am now worried like mad seeing that you got poz even though you wear a condom, i thought the hiv virus cannot survive in the air for long, and it must have been some transmission done while his penis is inside you... this is really bad... if it is true, then are condoms still useful at all?
by the way, for precum, what is it really? anyone can explain?

 
Old 01-22-2004, 07:22 AM   #4
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Exclamation Re: HIV may not be 'Easy' to transmit, HOWEVER!!- Please read this story!

Hi dxh & havoc,
Dxh don't freak until you get the results. If you are converting it's too hard to say just going by symptoms. I didn't have a headache when I did, but I had the worst sore throat and a minor fever. But you were the insertive person and most likely you didn't get anything inside your penis. Don't worry too much I think you'll be fine.

Havoc,
It is hard for the virus to live outside of the body for long but it can, if it's warm enough and for a short enough time. I have found published medical papers on this, because although the condom breaking was possible, I did not have any fluid (this is gross but necessary) come back out of my body after,(when I went to the bathroom) if you know what I mean. So it was either orally or from the pre-*** which is fluid secreted from a gland that is meant to lubricate the woman for intercourse naturally. It is the sticky fluid that oozes out while your errect but haven't ejaculated yet. Some people have a little and some have a lot. The guy I was with had a lot, and if his viral load was high then as my own doctor told me this could have been the mode of transmission. But this just means that people have to be more cautious using condoms in general with body fluids present. Remember there is no such thing as "safe-sex" even with a condom!! And I had been tested just weeks before exposure to this person and before that I had not other exposures so I know it was him. In fact he has cut off communication with me shortly after, which leads me to believe he either knew already or found out when the state contacted him. They just say to get tested and that someone you have been i contact with sexually tested HIV+ in the last year. And I know he had other partners so he wouldn't know it was me... I hope he's doing ok anyhow..



Quote:
Originally Posted by havoc
Dxh go and read poz's thread on rapid blah blah on viral load or something...

hey poz, i wore a condom too, damned!! i am now worried like mad seeing that you got poz even though you wear a condom, i thought the hiv virus cannot survive in the air for long, and it must have been some transmission done while his penis is inside you... this is really bad... if it is true, then are condoms still useful at all?
by the way, for precum, what is it really? anyone can explain?
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Andrew

 
Old 01-22-2004, 10:02 AM   #5
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maybe helpful HB User
Re: HIV may not be 'Easy' to transmit, HOWEVER!!- Please read this story!

Condoms ARE useful!! Although he used a condom, and STILL contracted the virus, it may have been through the precum he came into contact with, or the condom may have broken. Also, remember that male to male transmission is VERY high when you are the receptive anal partner. It is more difficult for a man to contract HIV through vaginal sex, BUT it is EASIER for a woman to contract HIV through vaginal sex with a man. Hes also right, there is NO such thing as "safe sex".

Viral Load is a HUGE factor in the transmission of HIV. The higher the Viral Load, the easier that transmission. Plus, and correct me if Im wrong Andrew, the Viral Load is VERY high during the initial reaction, such as the first few weeks after the virus is contracted. So, is it possible that the person you caught it from may have recently been infected himself?

Andrews post is VERY accurate, and puts a VERY real spin to the numbers we all know. There is only a 1 in 8000 chance you will be infected with HIV during a single sexual encounter with a partner of unknown status, but IF you are that one person, those odds dont seem good enough.

Good Luck to you Andrew, keep us posted!!!
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Old 01-22-2004, 12:33 PM   #6
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Re: HIV may not be 'Easy' to transmit, HOWEVER!!- Please read this story!

Poznmass -

Thanks so much for sharing your story. You passed on a lot of good information that will hopefully help someone.

I wish you the best and thank you again for passing along your story. I am amazed at well (mentally) you sound.

Take Care!

















Quote:
Originally Posted by maybe helpful
Condoms ARE useful!! Although he used a condom, and STILL contracted the virus, it may have been through the precum he came into contact with, or the condom may have broken. Also, remember that male to male transmission is VERY high when you are the receptive anal partner. It is more difficult for a man to contract HIV through vaginal sex, BUT it is EASIER for a woman to contract HIV through vaginal sex with a man. Hes also right, there is NO such thing as "safe sex".

Viral Load is a HUGE factor in the transmission of HIV. The higher the Viral Load, the easier that transmission. Plus, and correct me if Im wrong Andrew, the Viral Load is VERY high during the initial reaction, such as the first few weeks after the virus is contracted. So, is it possible that the person you caught it from may have recently been infected himself?

Andrews post is VERY accurate, and puts a VERY real spin to the numbers we all know. There is only a 1 in 8000 chance you will be infected with HIV during a single sexual encounter with a partner of unknown status, but IF you are that one person, those odds dont seem good enough.

Good Luck to you Andrew, keep us posted!!!

 
Old 01-22-2004, 10:44 PM   #7
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Re: HIV may not be 'Easy' to transmit, HOWEVER!!- Please read this story!

thanks for putting all this out there. i do wish you the very very best.
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