I got tested for the first time in my life on Halloween evening. Talk about the night of nights to begin the scariest waiting game I've ever been through...
I've never had any reason to believe something was wrong with me. I decided to get tested on everything while I was at the clinic because they diagnosed me with HPV, so I thought... what the hell, let's just be sure.
I don't know if I differ from everyone else this way, but I'm in high anxiety mode. I have been a WRECK the last 4 days. I got sick with anxiety/stress over all of this at work yesterday morning. It takes 10-14 days to get the blood test results back and I could not possibly be any more worked up. Today is better than yesterday, though.
I've had 5 sexual partners in my life. I've used protection with each of them every single time, except with oral sex. I've read about this like crazy and I know the stats and the facts, but still it's not enough to keep my mind at bay.
This waiting game almost seems like more torture than any of the possibilities, doesn't it?
I'm not looking for answers by posting this. I just wanted to put this out there to say to people that if this experience doesn't make you smarten up, I don't know what will. And that it shouldn't take a scare to make you protect yourself by taking all precautionary measures you can. Please don't ever put yourself at even the smallest risk, because a risk is still a risk. It wouldn't be a risk if there wasn't a possibility. I don't want other people to go through what me and millions of other people go through every year when they get tested.
My best friend is coming with me next week when I get my results back in. If everything turns out to be fine, it will be both the biggest cloud lifted off my shoulders as well as the best lesson I've learned to date.