Thats it...I've had enough !!!!!! - HIV Prevention Message Board

05-09-2002, 10:30 AM

I regularly post on here under different identities each time trying to re-assure myself that I do not have HIV so that I do not have to take the test. For the last 2 months I have been going out of my mind with worry and I am sure that I have messed up my finals because of it.

Well that is it. I think I am making myself ill with worry. I have every stress related illness in the book and I just wish I could have taken the test ages ago. Well I am going to after my exams in a couple of weeks and Ive realised that even if Im positive anything has to be better than not knowing.....

The point Im trying to make to anyone worrying about the test is.....YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH NOT TAKING IT MAYBE FOR A MONTH OR 2 BUT

EVENTUALLY IT WILL DRIVE YOU CRAZY !!!!!!!! LIKE IT HAS DONE ME......

FatAndDepressed · 07-21-2002, 12:59 AM

i am very glad you decided to get tested. yes the unknown will litterly drive you nuts. unfortunately some people just assume they are negative (and wind up being positive) and since they don't know they have it they wind up spreading it to others. it is very stressful waiting for the results, but it is better to know for sure than not know at all. if more people would get tested, less people would get it. so how did your test go? i hope you are doing better now. take care of yourself, and God bless!

ShouldHaveUsedATrojan · 07-21-2002, 01:06 PM

Yes It will make you go nuts and I'm glad you've decided to get tested, good luck and try not to worry about it before your finals, your biological status is decided already anyway so worrying will not change anything. I've also put myself through the worrying and stress for 1 full year now, but am finally strong enough to take that leap by getting tested. More nervous now than ever, thinking about if I will ever fall in love again or have a family or grow old or if I'm just exagerating, but I try to delete those images from my mind at the moment....Well hopefully by the end of this month or early August I will get the results and know what kind of life I'm meant to lead.

~Trojan

GreenSushi · 07-21-2002, 05:41 PM

I have been going through the same stress of being tested, the stress is horrible and it took me 2 years to get up the nerve. I've always wore a condom after my long term girl friend and now I'm married and the stress of thinking that I may have messed up my wifes life is bothering me more than anything. She keeps telling me to calm down and to relax, but as you all know thats close to impossible. I hope everything goes well for all of you. I still have 8 days till results it seems like forever.
Good luck!!