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Old 12-13-2009, 04:26 PM   #1
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Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

Hello i am 21 years old. I have always had one partner at a time for long periods of time. One night down on my luck and being stupid i decided to pick up a "lady of the night". I know it was retarted. However, i only received oral sex for about 5 minutes. I did not notice any bleeding but i cannot fully know as it was dark and i was nervous (im an idiot). Point is i dont know if its just guilt (i cheated) but i cant get me having hiv out of my head. This all happened in August. A week from that time i researched stds ect ect (maybe that was bad to do). I made myself believe i had herpes. I developed what i thought to be a rash on my scrotum and on lower part of shaft but i went to the doctors. She said it was not that i need to stop worrying and tested me for chlamydia and gonorrhea which both came back negative. I couldnt stop my fear and went to get it looked at again a few days later and was told the same thing. But during that time i had cold sweats and just feeling poor overall (i dont know if that was brought on by the constant fear, guilt and resentment). So that cleared my head about that (thank god or so i thought) But ever since then i cannot get out of my head i have hiv. I just want to know if it is as impossible as people say to get hiv from recieving oral or if i have every right to worry . I looked at the symptoms and although i never had a rash or what not i do remember being sick afterwards. Now i have had a bump appear on the back of my neck near my left shoulder and i dont know if that is a symptom. I am very thankful for any help you can offer and for the fact you had to read that drawn out explanation but I wanted to get every thing out of my mind so i can hopefully go on living my life.

 
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Old 12-13-2009, 04:42 PM   #2
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Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

Hi there,

the chances of you being infecting with HIV through oral sex, is small to zero. Please take my advice on this, STOP examining yourself, stop looking for symptoms in a way to confirm your worst fears. Symptoms are NEVER a reliable indicator of your HIV status. there is only one way to determine your status and that is through a blood test. If you are so concerned and to be honest you have no reason to be, then go for a test and set your mind at rest.

PLEASE stop beating yourself up. Stop feeling guilty and looking for ways to punish yourself. We all screw up mate, we all make mistakes, it does not mean that you automatically get HIV through it and your entire life is over. There are many factors involved, not least the HIV status of the person you was with. You have no idea whether this person was HIV positive or not but have automatically assumes she was in order to fuel your own guilt.

Take care mate, you have had a low to zero risk encounter, it is extremely unlikely you have been infected through this indecent.

Regards Kevin.

Last edited by blokecalledkev; 12-13-2009 at 04:44 PM.

 
Old 12-13-2009, 06:41 PM   #3
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Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

Yeah,
This board helped me. Its winter time of course you may get sick! But it's just a coincidence

 
Old 12-14-2009, 01:50 AM   #4
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Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

I second what a blokecalledkev said...he's spot on!

 
Old 12-14-2009, 06:02 AM   #5
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Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

I just want to say thank you. Iv read it's near impossibl to get it from oral but iv always seen how if you have a cut u could. And I cannot recall if I did or didn't. I guess I have to stop worrying and looking up this kind of stuff because all it does it make it worse. If anything atleast I learned from my mistake without dire consequences (I hope). Thank you all.

 
Old 12-14-2009, 07:15 AM   #6
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Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

Well I just wanna let u know in a few hours I have a doc appt. Regarding the bump on my neck now thinking it's a swollen lymph node (a symptom ) so I'm going to ask be tested and go am I a wreck I pray for the best and I will let u know

 
Old 12-14-2009, 01:01 PM   #7
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Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

I just want to say i summoned enough courage to go through with testing. Although my encounter happened in early august possibly july the woman said only one percent of people would read negative after 3 months. So it came back negative and i am exhilarated like a new beginning. I just want to let you all know how much appreciation i have for you guys replying. And as i have learned from this stupid mistake i hope you all learn too. Thank you.

 
Old 12-14-2009, 01:21 PM   #8
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Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

Simple. Less than 3% in the world has HIV think about it

 
Old 12-15-2009, 04:02 AM   #9
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Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

Quote:
Originally Posted by johndoe223 View Post
I just want to say i summoned enough courage to go through with testing. Although my encounter happened in early august possibly july the woman said only one percent of people would read negative after 3 months. So it came back negative and i am exhilarated like a new beginning. I just want to let you all know how much appreciation i have for you guys replying. And as i have learned from this stupid mistake i hope you all learn too. Thank you.
Of course it came back negative; you never had a risk.

 
Old 12-15-2009, 09:11 AM   #10
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Les Moore HB User
Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

Dude, get the Dr. to do a test. Then you will know and prob. have peace of mind.

 
Old 12-26-2009, 06:03 PM   #11
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Re: Non stop worrying borderline anxiety attacks and depression

If you want mate, I will present studies showing that oral sex is only a theoretical, and practically 0% risk.....

 
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