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Old 05-13-2010, 10:21 AM   #1
Join Date: May 2010
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Wes77 HB User
Chances of HIV - one off 1 night stand? Worried!?


hope someone can help.

3weeks ago I was away on a stag party. I live in the UK and we were in London for a few days. I very rarely drink but decided to get in the spirit, I ended up very drunk and slept with a girl I met in a club. I used a condom and only had sex with her once. In the morning the condom seemed intact and my fluids were still in the tip of it. She was on top and continued for a bit after I had came then I said I wanted to stop. I'm worried this may have made the condom slip a little?

I have a long term partner and this is very out of character for me, so I lt made so guilty and paranoid. I began to itch and convinced myself I had lice so I got a shampoo just in case. After a week I had a small dry patch of skin on my penis which was lighter than the rest, 2 docs have looked at this since and told me it was "nothing".

1 week after this incident I went for a full screen, all my bloods and urine came back negative but I understand from the nurses the HIV test won't be true for 3 months. I now can't stop thinkin I've messed my life up with one mistake, what are the chances of me having something serious and wit could this light patch of skin be?

Now I week 3 I feel very tired and have cold like symptoms, running nose sore head and also have a couple of spots on inside of my nose.

Can anyone advise what they think and give me some stats on my chances of picking up anything thro 1 off protected sex, particualary HIV??

Thanks, so worried. X

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Old 05-13-2010, 02:34 PM   #2
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Re: Chances of HIV - one off 1 night stand? Worried!?

Hi there,

Your chances of getting HIV through protected sex are virtually zero. HIV is not as easy to transit as people image, the accepted statistic for unprotected sex is 1 in 1000. Given the fact that you don't even know the HIV status of the person you was with, the fact you used a condom and the extreme difficultly of transition in ideal conditions, the chances are bordering on zero that you have been infected.

Yes a test at three months is considered conclusive; given your circumstances a blood test at four to six weeks will give you a pretty conclusive result. Your risk, was extremely small, almost zero, your test result will reflect this; it will almost certainly be negative.

Please stop beating yourself up; please stop looking at "HIV symptoms" on the net. We all make mistakes we all do silly thing when we have too many drinks. Guilt can and does do strange things to our bodies, please buddy, stop worrying.

Regards Kevin.

Last edited by blokecalledkev; 05-13-2010 at 02:38 PM.

Old 05-14-2010, 03:27 AM   #3
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 2
Wes77 HB User
Re: Chances of HIV - one off 1 night stand? Worried!?


thanks for responding.

I know my chances are very slim of picking up anything in this incident but it's just the nagging feeling that you could be unlucky that makes day to day living unbearable. Then when this week I start feeling tired and get flu like symptoms it gets my mind racing. I know what you mean about looking up symptoms but sometimes you look for reassurance then only serve to make things worse.

So do you think my symptoms are coincidence or because I'm stressed out about this? Also what could this small light patch of skin be? Never had it before, it's not sore or itchy, just a bit lighter?

Finally, it's 3 weeks since this incident, you said a test at 4-6 would be fairly reliable, any idea how reliable? (%?) just I'm looking for anything to keep me going just now?

Thanks again.

Old 05-14-2010, 12:38 PM   #4
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Re: Chances of HIV - one off 1 night stand? Worried!?

The facts of the situation are that you had a routine episode of protected sex. Since your condom was obviously intact, you could not have caught HIV. The fact that you used a condom is all the assurance that you should need.

Your mind is making this an issue for you because infidelity was involved. Please do not confuse the way you are feeling over this incident with HIV risk. I suspect that if a close friend was in your situation, your judgement of their HIV risk would be considerably different than your own.

After 6 weeks, HIV tests are 95-99% accurate. If you must test over this incident to get over it, a single test at 6 weeks should be accurate enough to prove to yourself that you were not infected.

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