Thanks jon, for having the strength to post such wisdom.
I'm at a point where I want to give up the fight. 2 years, just me, working full time, managing a home and 2 teenagers and all the medical bills on my own.
My 'friends' and family have avoided me. I guess it's human nature but I go days without contact with outside world.
I feel like I'm floating or sinking in this strange pool all alone. It's very surreal.
The massive amounts of antibiotics I've taken have helped I guess. My brain fog has gotten better.
But do I feel alive? no
Do I feel connected to the natural world? no
Do I feel the presence of God in my life? no
Do I feel the will to continue? sadly, no. not like this.
I feel less than a shell of whom I was. I don't know who or what I am, but it's no where close to what I was 2 short years ago.
I don't mean to bring down the tone of your post. I guess I'm reaching for straws. Also, I am humbled to think that this disease could wreak such havoc on seemingly normal healthy robust humans.
I appreciate that I came to know you. You are an inspiration. To see how far down you went, then to come back up and post your story here ... well ... if there was a medal for human endurance, I would nominate you.
You are so blessed to have your family around you. My family avoids me and that certainly doesn't make me feel warm or fuzzy.
May God bless and keep you and your family. You are a lucky man although you may not feel like one.
Peace and health to you.