My grandma just turned 91. She was in the hospital last week for what we thought was a TIA, but none of the tests they did were able to confirm it. I'm not sure what they did to her, but ever since she got home, she has literally been bedridden. She has only gotten out of bed to use the bathroom.
My entire family is completely at a loss. Before she went in the hospital, she would often complain of being tired and/or weak, but she was still perky enough to sit up in her chair or to go into her tv room and watch some tv. Now, she literally stays in bed all day and all night.
It's like she is giving up and doesn't want to deal anymore. I mean I guess it's possible. She's 91 after all, she's not young anymore. And perhaps she is just tired of fighting it. But she was NEVER like this until she was in the hospital last week. I've never seen her stay in bed so much, even when she had pneumonia a couple of years ago!
I keep telling my dad that's it's time to call hospice. He doesn't want to accept the fact that she is not getting better. He and my mom have already said they're never taking her back to the hospital again after what happened this last time, and if that's the case, then it's time to make that call. I don't want to face the fact that she's dying either, in fact it's one of the most painful things I've had to see. Just 5 years ago she was still in good spirits, walking around the house, doing stuff, going outside and looking at the garden and everything. But now it's like she can't hardly lift her head off the pillow!
My boyfriend thinks it's partly psychological and that maybe some of this weakness she is feeling is all in her head. That's certainly possible, especially since all of her tests at the hospital didn't indicate anything out of the ordinary. She didn't have a TIA, she didn't have a heart attack, nothing has really changed in the last 2 weeks except for the two nights she spent in the hospital. But that's not enough to make her bedridden!
So when I ask her why she thinks she feels weak and why she doesn't get out of bed, she tells me it's her age. She keeps saying her age is the reason why she feels so weak. But then I argue with her and tell her that she was never like this before going in the hospital, she said she doesn't remember! She literally thinks her age is causing her to be bedridden!
I'm totally at a loss. My parents are just as clueless as I am, and I feel terrible pushing them on this. But I think we need to all just face the fact that she's not getting well. It's time to take some action, and that means calling for hospice! What else can we do? We don't have any other options! We refuse to stuff her in a nursing home where they are just going to treat her like crap, she's better off at home with the family. But as far as the care we provide her, we can only do so much. I think we need some home healthcare and she needs the type of care a hospice worker can provide. I don't think we can let this go much longer.
Does anyone have any insight about hospice? And does anyone have any ideas about what to do about my grandma not getting out of bed? Should I try to make her get up and sit in her chair for a little bit? Or would that be worse? I don't even know anymore!