How do I tell my partner I have HPV - Human Papillomavirus (HPV) Message Board

NLJ0275 · 04-25-2009, 12:45 PM

How do I tell my partner I have HPV

Pickle Eyes · 04-25-2009, 03:27 PM

Do you have low risk or high risk HPV? How long have you been together?

NLJ0275 · 04-25-2009, 08:38 PM

Lol, well I actually thought that was a search line......geez shows where my head is at.

I was going to get a feel for what was going before posting but since I stuck my foot in my mouth already here goes.

Im 30 and I have had low risk HPV complete with genital warts for about 8 years now. I dated a few people after I knew that I had the virus courtesy of one of the STD sites because I cant stand to give this to someone else. Noting really ever happened long term though.

So about 3 months ago by sheer chance I met this woman that I am madly in love with and she feels the same about me. Of course I have not let it escalate to a sexual level which really sucks but I know better. The one saving grace right now is that she lives out of state....... She is a total sweetheart and I am terrified of breaking her heart.

I feel horrible for even falling in love with someone who doesnt have HPV but to be honest it just happened. Its tearing me apart inside because I want it to work so badly.

Anyway she is a bit older than me and I am in my 30s, what options does she have?

Thanks a ton for any advise, I really need it.

blueskies7 · 04-26-2009, 04:18 AM

I think that if you and your girlfriend are serious about each other, then you should be comfortable enough to tell her the truth. If she is as serious about her as you are about her, then I think she should be able to deal with HPV. I told my boyfriend before we even started dating, and he has been so supportive of me, even knowing that he might get it. Turns out that he has gotten it from me, but he has still stuck by me and loves me regardless of HPV. If you are up front with your gf, and equip her with information about the virus and how your low-risk strain is not life-threatening (just more of a nuisance), then I'm sure she will be understanding.

BTW, your post said you have been dealing with HPV (genital warts) for 8 years now. Do you mean you've had symptoms of genital warts on and off for 8 years? Because if you have been treated and have not had an outbreak in several years, the chances of you transmitting enough HPV viral particles to her to cause her to show symptoms of genital warts herself is a lot lower.

NLJ0275 · 04-26-2009, 06:45 AM

Mornin Blueskies,

Thanks for the reply, the problem is, is that besides folks who are in the same situation as I am I haven't told anyone about my HPV. My Genital Warts have come and gone, right now I am ok and havent had any signs for a while now but I want to go get checked out again just cuz. Of course with this wonderful economy I recently lost my great job with benefits and now am working my butt off for no benefits.....arrrrgh so out of pocket!

What about Gardasil for older women? I have read several accounts on here and elsewhere but can you actually get it from a doctor if you are over 26?

And thanks to all you women (and you dudes) for telling your partners and being honest, its great that there are people like us out there.