Re: Newbie and no answers to lots questions please help!
There are several reasons you haven't gotten a straight, precise answer to all of your questions. The number one reason is because research into HPV is fairly new; researchers have drawn different conclusions. I believe it is safest to go with the worst-case-scenario with what could happen That doesn't mean don't live life; it does mean be careful and more selective.
The second reason is because if someone has more than one partner in his/her life, then it is highly likely that he/she will be exposed to at least one (of 30) strain of HPV. The more partners, the more chances of having more strains of HPV. There is almost no way to track who gave whom what. HPV is the most common STD. Most people never know they have it, yet pass it along to future partners.
When it comes to "when do you tell?" I vote for before you have sexual contact. I would expect (from my self) that I would already trust that partner and was in love before becoming that intimate.