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Human Papillomavirus (HPV) Message Board
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Old 12-30-2010, 09:05 PM   #1
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Join Date: Dec 2010
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lucylucy555 HB User
How to tell a potential partner I have HPV

My very first partner, when i was 18, gave me the ,HPV virus,. (One that causes, anal warts) He knew about the virus, but did not think of telling me about it, i was devastated. Thinking of why me, the very first time??? ***...... I am 24 right now and the virus has not changed my life at all. I am a dental student, I do not sleep around,Im genuine and try to be honest and truthful as much as possible.

Since my first relationship i have dated two men. I have told both of them, before we hit the bedroom that i have the HPV virus. Neither the first, nor the one after seemed to care, they were concerned, however we still went on having long term relationships. My second partner cheated on me and so did my third, and they didnt tell the other girls about the virus. Which they contracted from me..... anyway, their jerks and i do not want to be part of that. I believe your partner has the right to know.

NOW... im dating this new guy. And i really like him, but i am soooo nervous about telling my condition. Im not really sure how he would react, with the other two guys i went into the conversation thinking whatever happens happens if they dont accept me then it's not meant to be, and it will separate the jerks from the keepers...

I dont know how to tell this new guy, he is 28 and not a little kid he is mature, but then again.... im just soo nervous (maybe im just looking for compation, because i keep my condition to myself, none of my friends or family members know)...

Has anyone ever told someone and gotten rejected? i feel like he would slam the door right in face and tell me to leave, which would crush me Tomorrow is NYE and we are spending it together, im not sure if this is the right time to tell him, but i want to let him know before this gets any more serious, and both of us gets hurt...or at least me.

How do i go about this? I know HPV is not the end of the world, and for some reason i have suspicions that he may have something too ( considering his past relationships with sluts, but assumption is nothing so i try to stay away from that)........ Should i tell him tomorrow? on NYE while we have plans to just sit and relax together at his apartment? and enjoy each others company ???? I need to tell him soon, because i cant look him in the eye i just want to burst it out....

 
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:25 AM   #2
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Join Date: Jan 2011
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wakeupinmexico HB User
Re: How to tell a potential partner I have HPV

I know what you are going through. My wife and I discovered that we had this 8 months into our (dating) relationship. Shamefully, we concluded that it came from me. I was unaware that I had it. We went through a rough period, her more so than me because she was the only one with symptoms. We worked through it (although I thought we did) because we eventually ended up getting married and were a happy couple for the past 3 yrs. As it turns out, she gradually lost her physical desire to want to have sex with me, and as a result, she found someone else and wants a divorce. I guess that I am thinking of the same thing you are. I'm Worried about my future with someone else. I thought then, "wow, I got off easy. I (unknowingly) gave this hot girl HPV and she still wants to marry me." Now I'm paying a huge price, because of something that wasn't dealt with, emotionally. I've been looking up this topic for the past few days now and the general consensus is to have an actual sit down talk with this person, but don't make it dramatic. You have to just practice what you're going to say, and tell them. Good luck, and let me know how this goes.

Last edited by wakeupinmexico; 01-06-2011 at 10:42 AM.

 
Old 01-06-2011, 11:48 AM   #3
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Join Date: Jan 2011
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pineapple798 HB User
Re: How to tell a potential partner I have HPV

I want to applaud you for your openness and honesty. As a male i would want to know if a potential partner has any kind of condition i should be aware of.

If the guy is genuine he should appreciate your honesty. He will probably be shocked and possibly scared initially, he may not realise what your condition is and how is might affect him. Forewarned is forearmed they say, give him all the relavent information and im sure it will be fine. Best of british luck to you.

 
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