My wife told me today she has HPV . We've been married 25 yrs. I have been faithful and I think she has too. but she is blaming me. I have no signs genital warts or anything. But I am faced with a difficult problem... she is blaming me... 24 yrs she has had a pap test all neg until now. What is likely the problem, is she or has she cheated and is now blaming me? sort of reverse blame guilt... I have never nor do i think she has. I want to be supportive to her. I also want to be supportive to myself because of this virus and it's dangerous potential. She is accusing me and I am faced with 2 things... her diagnosis and my relationship. All she has said to me is "everyone said you'd respond that way". She won;t talk about it only to the extent of blame. I have been faithful for entire time. i have no symptoms but her test is positive. After 25 yrs of marriage this could end it all for us and I am concerned for her health, my health and especially our relationship.
But now I have to get tested...I'm worried for her and myself also. I am 52 male what options and suggestion anyone can give me?
Last edited by tradewin; 01-26-2012 at 03:04 AM.
Reason: late night writing mispelled words and and left out wording
According to the Center for Disease Control of the Department of Health there is not currently a recommended test for males. However, genital warts, etc are an indication of HPV in males.
HPV can clear on its own and can lay undetected for years as well. There are tons of literature from respected researchers and institutions including the CDC concerning this topic. It is also possible for a mother to pass HPV to her child at birth. It, too, can lay dormant for years.
This happened to us also. I have been faithful and so has she for over 25 years that we have been married. The doctor said that it can be transmitted in other ways besides intercourse like skin to skin or from the mother. It came as a shock, but this virus must lie dormant for a very long time because it has been almost 30 years since we have been with anyone else. She was advised to have a hysterectomy and she just recovered from it. She never accused me outright, but I think she suspects I gave it to her.
Last edited by ricknelson8; 12-03-2012 at 08:10 PM.
Just because she has HPV DOESN"T mean she cheated on you or you cheated on her. someone can get HPV from CONTACT: AKA, at the GYM from using a dirty towel, or trying on a bathing suit. Most people think its sexually transmitted ONLY but it's NOT. so she could have gotten it and neither one of you cheated, so hold you head up! also, like it's been said it lays dormat for YEARS (or atleast it can) because it's a specific kind of virus that attaches and waits (not the kind like a cold that kills cells within 12 hours)