So about two months ago I was diagnosed with HPV genital warts. At this point I've had just about every treatment, not because they were a bad case but because I did not respond well to many of the treatments. I've stuck with cryo and just had my 4th treatment. It has been extraordinarily effective and you really can't see anything anymore. Then I was hit with the bad news of an internal wart that we have decided to do weekly acid treatments for.
The problem is I have been dating someone. Don't worry, no sex etc. I want to be honest and up front about the situation, to allow him to make a decision from there, a chance I was not given. I am starting to like him more and more, we have been on a handful of dates, gone on adventures (snowboarding/running etc.) and I've stayed at his place and he's stayed at mine. It's only been a month, and I don't know what his intentions are so I'm not sure when the right time to bring it up is.
What are the best expectations to have when approaching this situation and when do you think the right time is? I don't want to tell someone that's just looking to have fun because it's a very vulnerable place to put myself in, but I also don't want to wait too long and have them not trust me if it is going toward a relationship.
My expectation is that his first response will not be the ultimate one, it's a scary thing to hear, but I've seen a lot of doctors, done my research and know the facts. I would certainly give him links to websites to read and even the number of some doctors. Also I want to add in that I could not get the HPV vaccine because I had an autoimmune disease for 15 years and vaccines can make it resurface, I would rather risk the inevitable HPV which is cleared in majority of cases than deal with the auto immune disease again.
First of all, good for you for having the knowledge about your condition. I, like you, was not given a choice. As for your question, I don't think there is any right answer. I have had a variety of reactions. One was that they didn't care, and another was that they didn't want to have anything to do with me. Luckily, the man I am with now, is okay with it, and we have been together for three years now, and I'm sure we will marry. Just be prepared to answer a lot of questions! Things like, how you got it, can they get it, etc. My guy asked a lot of questions, and did a lot of research himself.
Honestly, the way I look at it is, if you tell this guy and he walks away from you, then he didn't deserve to have you anyways. There are millions of people who have this STD, and there IS someone who will accept it, and love you no matter what.
Luckily I have not had any reoccurrence since 2006 when I had them burned/lasered off, and in the three years me and my boyfriend have been dating, he has not had any occurrence of HPV either. I actually check him once in awhile because I don't want to have them go unnoticed.
Good luck with everything!! I hope this post helped!! I hope if/when you tell him, he appreciates the fact that you're respecting him enough to tell him, and that you're giving him a choice!
The Following User Says Thank You to That one girl For This Useful Post: purplebloom (06-16-2013)