Hi Abbey -
Perhaps two of the stickies at the top of the lupus board would be enlightening for you to read. They are "Criteria to Dx Lupus" and "antiphosphoidlipoid syndrome".
Your cold hands and feet are possibly Reynaud's as that is also common with autoimmune problems. I have it and often wear socks in the summer as my toes ache so much when cold. Socks help!
Several symptoms on your list hint at lupus - but I'm no doctor! I have lupus myself.
Read those stickies and see what you think.
Wishing you well - Barbara