why is this so hard. Nursing isn't supposed to be this problematic is it? - Infant Care (up to 18 months old) Message Board

besafe20 · 01-17-2008, 10:20 AM

Well my son is 4 weeks old. We have been through severe engorgement, sore blistered nipples, mastitis, and now my son isn't nursing well. Since birth he was a great nurser and now he hates my left breast. When I try to nurse him he gulps, screams, and chokes on my milk. The right side is fine. I called a lactation consultant and she came over. I was supposed to feed on the right side when she was here, but i wanted to show her what my son does so I put him on the left. Of course he decided to nurse wonderfully. But we determined it was because he had that side 3 hours ago so the flow wasn't so heavy. She weighed him and said he took in nearly 4 1/2 ounces in that feeding and I still had milk in there, plus I wasn't even due to feed on that side again. She said I have an over supply of milk and need to lower it so the baby can finish at least one breast in a feeding and so he can nurse without drowning. My right side has a slower flow due to the mastitis she says so thats why he isn't fighting me on that one. So now she wants me to nurse on one side 2 feedings in a row and then do the same for the other. My supply should be lowered in a few days. I am going to have to deal with being engorged but I have been getting engorged easily anyways. I am so frustrated. I feel bad for the baby and and feel like I am not meant to breast feed since I encounter one problem after another. Sorry I just needed to vent

KeltoKel · 01-17-2008, 11:30 AM

I know how you feel with the frustration of breastfeeding. I never had luck with it b/c my supply never caught up with my son's demand.

But I would say that breast feeding is very hard and nobody seems to tell us how much of a challenge it can be. It seems like something we should be able to do so naturally as women, but I just don't think that is true.

Don't beat yourself up over it. Whatever milk your baby can get is great. I have a friend that pumped for 10 months b/c her son had problems latching on, and then he just took to the bottle.

It is good you have a lactation consultant coming over though. I had one as well and she was so nice and supportive. I would call her crying and she just made me feel so comfortable, instead of the failure I felt like. It was a very stressful time for me, that I don't think I enjoyed all the moments of my son being so little.

Hang in there and know what you are a great mother no matter what happens.

mjbrandon · 01-17-2008, 11:34 AM

I just wanted to let you know that you aren't the only one who had a terrible time nursing. Let me give you a run-down of what we went through.

I was totally determined to nurse. I read several books prior to DD being born and was so excited about nursing. DD is born, and she is tongue-tied. She is compressing my breast with her gums instead of using her tongue. I am is terrible pain everytime I nurse. Plus, she can't get much milk because her tongue isn't pulling the milk out right. Well, 3 weeks later (after five trips to the lactation consultant) I finally get her tongue-clipped, thinking that will solve the problems. Well, she still uses her gums to compress and my supply is nearly non-existant. So, I decide to exclusively pump. I get 2 ounces every 2-3 hours. It is ridiculous. Then DD starts having diahrea and puking every time I feed her breast milk. Come to find out she has severe reflux and a milk protein allergy.

That is when I finally threw in the towel. DD is on special formula, and doing great.

I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone in having difficulties with nursing. Formula feeding is what was ultimately right for me, but I tried EVERYTHING before I stopped. There were no other options. Just know that no matter what happens, your DC with be just fine. I thought it was the end of the world when I stopped nursing, but the truth is my DD is just fine. In fact, I thought DD was going to be sickly, because they always say that kids who are breast-fed are healthier. Well, DD has only been sick one time in 8 months, and my friend breast feeds her baby and she is 5 months old and has been sick 4 times atleast.

Keep your chin up. No matter what happens, your baby will be ok.

daisychain_0506 · 01-17-2008, 04:15 PM

I agree, it isn't as easy as I thought it would be either. My DD lost more than 10% of her body weight after she was born (she was 7lb 5) and the nurses started panicking saying I had to go to a lactation place and should supplement with formula and pump all the time etc. I went to the lactation place every couple of days and they watched me feed and then gave me different tips. The doctor put me on pills to increase milk supply. I knew then that the problem wasn't supply, it was that DD was too tired to eat every 2hrs which is what they wanted me to do. She would sleep all the time and wake up roughly every 4hrs. She would sleep all night. I did try and wake her up every couple of hours but she just would fall asleep. She did it once at the lactation place so they knew the issue. She was born at 37wks 4days so they think she just wasn't ready to feed properly and needed her sleep. She never cried so wasn't starving or anything.

It would take me about an hour to try and feed her and then I would have to pump which would take 20 minutes and then clean up and then the process started again. That's all I did for about a month! I'm glad my mum was there to help with everything else. Trying to get a sleepy baby to latch when she could care less was impossible. Along with cracked nipples and pumping one side while it healed led to lopsided boobs!! She still gulps faster on the left

Anyway, she gradually put on weight and they were happy with her and now she is in the 85th centile for weight and height and is a little chubster. I could have done without the panic that they gave me early on as it's rough for a new mum, but we are still breastfeeding and she is now 7mths. I was very temped to call it quits many timesin the first 6 weeks and I probably couldn't have done it if I had another child to take care of or something but it is worth it in the end if you can get through the rough parts. It sounds like you are getting great support from the lactation ladies too so I hope it gets better for you.

If it doesn't work out then your baby will thrive just as well on formula, don't let anyone make you feel guilty about doing that if it's the best thing for you in the end.

Best of luck.

Daisy

besafe20 · 01-17-2008, 07:50 PM

wow you all have made me feel better just knowing I am not the only one. I just realized today my mastitis is back again. Same side and just four days after stopping the antibiotic. So called the doctor this evening ASAP and now I am back on a longer course of antibiotics. Good thing I still have some motrin to take for the pain

The doctor told me not to skip or extend feedings to lower my supply right now. Luckily I have found if I pump my left breast a little before nursing he will nurse without throwing a huge fit. I can't believe the mastitis is back. It would be a shame to throw in the towel since DS latches and is thriving. But all of these issues are so hard.