2nd child is so NEEDY!! - Infant Care (up to 18 months old) Message Board

Viktorria · 07-20-2008, 05:17 PM

My first child (DS, now 5) was so easy going. By 5 months he would sit in his high chair and I'd put toys on the tray. He'd sit there for almost an hour playing quietly while I cleaned up the kitchen, vacuumed, whatever needed done. To this day he's still like that... very long attention span, great at entertaining himself.

Our second child, DD is 7 months old. She is just the opposite - so high maintenance! She refuses to be put down, screams at the top of her lungs if she isn't being held and entertained. Often it requires carrying her around the house because sitting in one place isn't good enough. And to make matters worse, Dad is not on her "favorites" list. If he's holding her and she sees me, it's all over - I end up having to get her b/c she'll start throwing a fit.

Looking for any advice? I didn't have to teach DS to play alone b/c it was just his personality. It's exhausting carrying her around all the time, and now I'm pregnant with # 3 so, I'm doubly exhausted.

How can I get her to entertain herself for a few minutes?

JenW67 · 07-21-2008, 09:20 AM

My first son was like that and at 3 is still kind of needy, especially now that we have a 4 month old baby.

When he was quite small, I needed to get him to be able to be alone for a few minutes at a time. This is what I did. I would pick a time of day when I wasn't overly stressed of trying to get something done ( I know, this is almost impossible with more than one kid). Then, I would leave him for 20 seconds at a time or so, increasing it every few days or so. He fussed a bit but I got to the point where I could take a shower!

Maybe it was just that over the time I did this, he matured a little bit. I don't really know. I just know it got a little better.

Good luck,

Jen

simplyheather · 07-21-2008, 10:40 AM

My son is kinda like your daughter, when he sees me, he wants me! lol He doesn't stay with dad when I'm around!! But I found that when I put him down in his playpen when I needed to get something done, I just let him cry. I took plenty of showers with the door open listening to screaming! haha Crying doesn't hurt them. He still doesn't like to be left alone, but its easier on him if he can't see me. He would eventually start playing by himself... but still a momma's boy! lol

kristi6190 · 07-21-2008, 04:46 PM

i put my daughter in her highchair in front of the tv. i know it sounds bad but it helps when you have to do something. i give her a few snacks(gerber puffs) and let her watch one show(30 min). something colorful, meant for toddlers, blues clues, the backyardigans, etc. shes so into the colors and voices that she doesnt really notice i'm not right there.

BabyJulie · 07-24-2008, 12:19 PM

My first born twin is very much like this, and dealing with a 3 year old, and another 11 month old is exhausting when he needs all of my attention.

This may sound weird but once he was well established in solids everytime he cried wanting to be held or wantng my attention i'd give him a spoonful of something, or as he got older pieces of finger foods.

That actually quieted him down ALOT and he is actually pretty content without being held all day.