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Old 12-07-2007, 11:47 AM   #1
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dannil126 HB User
Question anyone else using donor sperm?

DH and I are using donor sperm and were wondering If there is anyone out there who can relate to this situation

love danielle

 
Old 12-07-2007, 01:41 PM   #2
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Mapia74 HB User
Re: anyone else using donor sperm?

Hi Danielle DH and I are using donor sperm as well.If you ever need anything just ask me.What are you guys doing IUI?We have done a few IUI's BFN and I did have a chemical pregnancy one month.Its been really rough but I am keeping the faith I know we will have that baby we want.Let me know what you guys are doing.Take care and good luck.

Mapia

 
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Old 12-07-2007, 02:36 PM   #3
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dannil126 HB User
Re: anyone else using donor sperm?

hey mapia yes we did one cycle IUI w/ clomid. That one time turned out to be what the doctor called a blighted ovum so yes i was pregnant but No fetus ever grew. We used a anon. donor and u know we felt lucky to achieve pregnancy with our first try but as I said it didnt end well. I had a D&C to remove all the tissues on the 28th of November so I am still recovering from everything. I never had my full out cry session till yesturday when i was just inconsolable! i just couldnt stop crying. Even DH just didnt know what to do but let me get it all out. I think i really needed to. So i was just wondering how u felt TRULY about using donor sperm. I feel very comfortable with our decision to use DS but I was wondering what are your feelings on telling the child as they grow up that has been a question DH and I have wondered for so long ...to tell or not to tell. We had to meet with a psychologist and she asked us WILL you tell the child and DH and I didnt know what to say and I said to her I guess only time will tell and she said well thats not very fair to the child and I told her THIS is our personal decision and you have no right or wrong answer for us so DONT try and tell us one way is wrong or another.

talk to u later my dear
PS its so nice to be able to talk with sumone about this FINALLY

 
Old 12-07-2007, 04:26 PM   #4
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Kari15 HB User
Re: anyone else using donor sperm?

Hi Danielle, although I am not using donor sperm myself I want u to know u are not alone. There are many couples on this board who are using donor and there are also many who have graduated to the preg board who used donor!!! As for that counselor, i don't like way she treated u. You will have a child that will be loved immensley. It IS your decision! You take all the time u and Dh need to decide how to handle telling or not telling the child.

I am so sorry to hear how upset you were yesterday. Considering the emotional pain that comes along with losing a child it is understandable that you broke down into tears. I just wish I could have been there to give u a big hug. I remember when u got your BFP... I was just behind u in the 2ww... And I remember how sad it was hearing how u lost the baby... When one of my board sisters experiences a loss I kinda feel like I also experience a bit of a loss. My heart still aches for u. But I know that the future holds a sticky BFP for you and I look forward to the day we will celebrate that!!!! Hope u feel better today and huge hugs to you!!!

 
Old 12-07-2007, 04:47 PM   #5
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Greece
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Mapia74 HB User
Re: anyone else using donor sperm?

H Danielle I am so sorry you cried so much yesturday but yes I agree you have to cry and let it out its good for you.Trust me all of us here have cried so much through our IF journey.I am also sorry you had to go through all that.It does feel good to be able to talk to people who understand you.This board was god sent thats how I feel.Well when I found out we had to use donor in order to have a baby I was devastated felt like a big slap in the face.At first I dident feel good about it but my DH was great he kept telling me it will be your baby it might not be biologically mine but I will love this child more then life itself and it will be a part of you and I love you more then life itself.He would also tell me DNA doesnt make a father and so on.He is so right he will love this child more then anything in the world thats why I cant wait to give him a child.We had the same thing with a shrink before our first IUI.She asked the same question but DH and I had already deceided to not tell the child.We feel there is no reason to and the shrink said thats fine but make sure you dont tell anyone else that way the child never hears it from someone else.No one knows other then my mother and she will take it to her grave I know for sure.He wont tell his parents he fears they might not treat the child the same.So every couple is different its totally up to you and DH and I dont think there is a wrong or right in this situation.No one has the right to judge you NO ONE.Its a hard decesion but you and DH will come to a conclusion that you both feel good about.I feel better about the whole donor thing I dont even think of it as being donor anymore I just think they are putting DH's sperm inside me.So know we are here for you and like Kari said there are many of us out there using donor and a few who are about to give birth so it does work you just need patience.Take care sweetie and know you are in my thoughts.

Mapia

 
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