I'm starting to question my RE. It seems like she keeps changing her mind. First of all she said we'd start meds for my IVF cycle on Christmas Eve, but the place she referred my DH to for a SA took a WEEK to get results back. THEN the RE tells me that insurance takes TWO weeks to approve stuff, so that it will be too late for me to start the meds on Dec.24th. Okay, fine. I accepted that. Then on the 24th I get a messages saying we were approved and that I should start meds on the 31st.
But they never ORDERED the meds for me. No problem, I call and they order them for me. Since I was out of the country, they delivered them to my aunt, and when I arrived home last night I was to start the meds.
To make this whole situation more complicated, when DH had his second SA (in December) his count was ONE. As in ONE sperm and a lot of WBCs. He had a strep infection and was put on antibiotics. The RE KNEW this, and still told me to start meds on the 1st. She even called me when I was away to say that DH should schedule a repeat test as soon as we got back, and that if his count was still really low (the first SA we had was 200,000) that we'd have to have him donate multiple times so they would have enough sperm for the IVF.
Well yesterday, the 1st, I started Lupron. Today I called the nurse to double-check the dose, and she asked if DH had made his SA appt yet. I said no, but he would soon. She said to let her check with the RE to see how soon it needed to be.
She calls me back and says to STOP THE LUPRON, and that the RE has now decided DH needs to wait two weeks after stopping the antibiotics before he does a repeat SA. BUT SHE ALREADY TOLD ME TO SCHEDULE IT ASAP last week. ***?
Then, the nurse says that after they get those results back they need to get approval from insurance. Um...***? They already approved all the meds...and he only had ONE sperm. If that ain't infertile, I don't know what is! So the nurse says since that can take like, 2 weeks for approval, I should expect to start Lupron in late January. That means it will be MARCH before we know if it's worked or not.
I'm so sick of this. They keep changing their minds on things!
Should I switch REs??? And why can't DH do an SA NOW, like Friday or Saturday and see what his count is? If his count is still super-duper low (ie under 200,000) then we can test again in a week...but if it's better a bit, and the infection is gone, then why cant they submit that to Insuarance? And if they still need another test a week later (so 2 weeks after he finished antibiotics) then they can do WHILE I TAKE THE MEDS.
I am so sick of this. We are supposed to move to Canada the end of March. So this means if we dont get pregnant the first IVF cycle, we have to wait 90 days (at least) before trying again, as it will be 90 days after moving to Canada before we'll have any sort of medical coverage. And I imagine the IVF places in Canada will want to do their OWN testing.
*Sgih* I'm almost ready to suggest we use donor sperm.
Hey Daiseys, I really am sorry to hear of the frustration your RE office has caused you. It's truly unfortunate that some of the details were overlooked before they advised you on so many different fronts. Their inconsistency does seem questioning. But maybe if you want to get an IVF in before you move, it might be a good idea to stick with this office. Unfortunately it can take weeks even just getting an initial appt to see a new RE. Maybe all the inconvenience this office has caused you early in the cycle will be a distant memory once the embryos they transfer back implant and grow into your little baby . Wishing you all the best. Good luck.
Thanks, Kari. It's just so damned hard. I really thought we'd have a baby by now, or at least, I'd be pregnant. A girl I know got married and is pregnant and almost due. This all has occured in the time we've been trying.
What makes it harder, is that my family doesnt know we're trying - aside from DH's aunt, who got the meds for us, and my mom. So they're all going "Move up to Canada!" and they dont get why we dont just go now. Before we were waiting for DH's immigration to come through, and now that it's come through, they want us to come there asap. I was supposed to start Nursing school there next month, but have pushed it back to next Feb. I'm just scared, cuz if we don't conceive in March, then it will be hard for me to start school then. I'll have to push it back even further. I mean, having a baby is so much more important, but it's frustrating.
Yeah, I feel for you. IF often forces us to put the rest of our lives on hold. I couldn't imagine the additional dilemma posed by moving, especially to another country with a completley different healthcare system. I really hope you get pregnant by March and then there will be no future worries for you other than your constantly expanding waist-line! Hang in there hun!
I am so sorry that you've had so much frustration with your RE's office!! IF is hard enough on it's own, and these offices add so much more difficulty. It really isn't fair! I agree with Kari - if you're going to be moving soon, it probably does make more sense to stick with this office so that you can complete this cycle. I'd make it super super clear to your nurse and the doctor that you're leaving the country and you need everything to BE DONE PROPERLY and to be efficient, so that there aren't any setbacks.
We all know how hard it is when people around us become pg without any difficulty. And as for family, DH and I did not tell anyone during our first cycles either - they did not find out until after I m/c. Now, we've told them we're not going through with further treatment (but we are). It's so tough to have to pretend everything's okay for them. Hang in there!! I am really hoping that this cycle will be it, and that you'll be moving to Canada pg!!!
wow, that is extremely frustrating, don't you sometimes think the RE and nurses forget that this is the most important thing in the world and all that we think about. To add all the stress of moving out of the country to the mix. Wow, girly, you have a lot on your plate and we all agree that IF sucks!!! it makes it that much harder when family doesn't understand or know what is going on, I don't blame you for not being open. It is really hard for anyone outside the circle to really comprehend or understand, as much as they may try. We really are a secret club and have to stick by each other and up for eachother because only another IF sister can understand the whole realm of it all.
I agree with the other gals, it would be adding more difficulty to the situation if you tried to switch clinics, I know I have thought of it too but you don't have a lot of time and you dont want to have to start over or even bigger yet, risk being on a waiting list for the next IVF cycle to start.
I would definitely be adament when you talk to them that you feel like they are not taking your unique circumstances into account and you want everything finalized so you can move forward.
I wish you all the luck in the world and please keep us posted
I've switched 3 RE's and 3 GYN the last 7 years going through this and I can tell you first hand that they will redo everything that you have done thus far, even if it is within the last 3 months. More money, more time. If you were not restricted with time I would suggest to see someone ele because you want to have full confidence in the clinic when dealing with something so sensitive, but as stated by many others it would be more hassel for you and DH with your upcoming move to try and find someplace else.
I wish you luck in your decision and hope for a soon BFP before your move!
thanks for that added info I wondered how they handled switching clinics, that would be horrible to have to start over and redo all testing, that would be a lot of time and money.
I spoke to my RE's nurse and asked why it seemed that we were getting conflicting information. She apologized, and said that insurance approved teh meds but not the procedures (ER, Transfer, etc) since DH's last count was only one. They wanted to see a repeat. I guess at first they thought it would go through, so they were going to start me on the meds, but then they thought it wouldn't go through. The RE spoke to insurance and that was the impression she got, apparently.
Since DH finished his antibiotics on the 30th they want to give him 2 weeks to make sure the infection is all gone so tht the WBCs aren't taking up all the room and making his count go down. She said that after two weeks it should be back to his "normal" count or close-to. If the count is better then 1, at least a couple thousand, they'll just have him do like, several samples a week and combine the sperms to use for IVF (or something like that). If the count is not better, then we'll do another SA in 2 more weeks and send him to a urologist to see if they can find a blockage (his hormones are totally normal and he doesnt have a varocele) and if they can fix it, or if they can aspirate the sperm directly from his testicles.
While on the phone, the nurse went "Oh! Look at that!" apparently TODAY insurance approved us for one full IVF cycle. If it doesnt work, we'll need to submit for another one and so on and so forth.
SOOO...basically this means that as soon as we get another SA that shows that he has some sperm, I will start meds that night.
DH has an SA booked through the RE on the 14th, and one booked thru his GP this coming Monday. The GP ordered the one to check on the infection, because the RE sent his results showing the infection to him, and he wants to make sure the meds worked.
So my plan is that if Monday's SA is good, we'll send a copy to the RE. If not, we'll play dumb and wait til the next one.
I also have a tentative appt for us with another local IVF clinic the end of January just in case our current RE starts messing us around again.
So pray DH's count is better (much better!) Monday and that the infection is gone!
If it is, we may only be a week behind on this cycle.
It is so infuriating that the insurance companies are able to dictate everything. I hate it! I'm glad that they finally did approve this cycle, though, and I am praying for you that you can move forward as soon as possible! I hope that DH's SA looks much better and that the infection is gone!!! Please keep us posted - I am wishing you all the best!!!
. Wishing you all the best. Good luck.
Hang in there hun!
