My husband donated a kidney - Kidney Disorders Message Board

purplegirl1 · 02-07-2007, 06:43 PM

My husband's family has a rare kidney disorder that is carried from the mother to the son - where your kidneys don't function or stop functioning.. like Alports syndrome, something called Neuphron Med. I can't remember, but my husband donated a kidney to his brother who had this disease. Is it possible that a person can change after doing this? My husband did this about 5 years ago and he has been more depressed, can't find a job he likes, more angry, gained weight, and tired alot since doing this.. Any advice, thanks.

Cora1003 · 02-07-2007, 09:07 PM

In most cases, people are happier after a donation than before. Has he been to a doctor regarding his problems? Maybe something else is going on. Donors are put through an exhaustive workup so whatever he has, it is probably not kidney related.

Sorry I can't be more help.

Cora

feelbad · 02-09-2007, 04:26 PM

this actually does sound like symptoms of depression,this can come on for many different reasons.i seriously doubt, like cora stated,that this is directly from the kidney donation itself.it could be he is feeling some ambivalent type feelings over this or something.it wouldn't hurt to try and speak with him or have a trusted friend who you know he would possibly open up to try and do it.even having him see his own primary doc,if the doc is more the sympathetic type,and speak with him about just exactly how he has been feeling lately.

if you are noticing changes in his normal behavior and personality,chances are he is too but may not even understand why.but it really does sound from what you have stated that he really does need to speak to someone,it would appear that there is something that is bothering him.if he is anything like my husband,getting someone else to speak with him may work better than you trying to pry it out of him.he may not want to open up as much to you,despite the fact you two could have a wonderful relationship,there are just certain things that i know my hubby has a harder time speaking with me about than one of his 'bonded guy friends"you know what i mean?he,luckily has gotten better over the years but sometimes,its just gotta be another guy.

or just simply ask him if anything is wrong and mention the changes you are seeing and that you are only asking because you love and care about him and are concerned.who knows,it just may work.just getting him talking is really the big thing,to anyone.i wish you luck with this.please let us know how you two are doing.marcia

purplegirl1 · 02-09-2007, 06:05 PM

Thanks, well ever since he gave the kidney he can't seem to find a job that is right for him. He had to leave that job because it was too physical, I wonder if that is it. He had left a few jobs and just can't find his niche.. thanks for the advice, maybe once he finds a job that he is happy with things will be different?? Thanks.