I am in somewhat of a sticky spot. My husband and I have a cousin that is the type of person that is just fine living off the system and not willing to try to better herself or her children. For the most part her life style never effects us but..... Our cousin has a beautiful little girl that will be 3 in March. We have a little boy that just turned 3 so we let the kids play together alot of the time. This little girl is a very sweet but if you tell her NO about anything or even for her to wait. She will have a complete melt down. It is the most extreme thing I have ever seen. She will fall to the ground & scream rolling back and forth. In my heart I think something is just not right.
The little girl is also not talking. She does say a few word not many that I can understand. She has never put two words together that I have heard. For example this is the kind of things she "will" say. If she wants to watch a movie she will come find you and all she sayes is "PUSH". That means she wants to watch a movie. We have another cousin, JJ that is VERY close with this little girl and tried to put her in a perschool thinking that would help even paid for it. The mother never took her. When she sayes "JJ" I have no idea what she is saying, it soulds nothing like JJ but somehow JJ know what she is saying. We went to a party the other day and she said "PARTY", you would have thought the world stoped spining. It was like it was her first word.
Like I said in my heart I think something is wrong. I dont know what it is but @ 34 months you should be saying more that "push" to watch a movie. The problem is the mother dosent care, the cousin does but her hands are tied, and I feel led to help but dont know how. Is it ok that she is not talking and having such extreme melt downs when she is within 2 months of 3 yrs old.
How do I help her ???????
Last edited by FINE TIMES; 12-30-2007 at 11:36 PM.
Fine Times,
I see no one has answered your post so I'll give it a go! It seems to me that this little girl is not getting enough interaction. Children learn to speak by being spoken to and mimicing sounds. If she never has to ask for things and just gets what she wants by pointing or grunting that's all she will do. As far as the melt downs, it appears she may not be used to being told "no". As her cousin, there isn't much you can do besides advise her and maybe offer to have the little girl over more and encourage her to speak by saying a word and having her repeat it to you. Good luck and it's nice of you to care.
What if you copied what you posted here/or wrote a new letter and sent it to her pediatrician? If you have something like an Intermediate Unit, the Dr. could put a referral in so the child is screened. In our area it would automatically happen.
Send in anonymously as a red flag to be put in the file.
You'll see big meltdowns are very common when a child can't express his/her ideas, thoughts or feelings.
She should definatly be speaking more. Children who are almost 3 should be able to form 2 or 3 word sentences and be learning longer words, like helicopter for example. I am suprised her pediatrician has not refered her to some sort of early intervention program. I would encourage that if you can search speech delay and a whole bunch of information comes up like speech timetables, tips on exercises to work with the late talker, and info on sign language. A huge part of her temper tantrums is most likely the inability to express her needs and emotions through words so she is communicating the only way she knows how. Good luck.
Does this child point to objects she is interested in? Does she bring toys or objects to show you or others? Does she let you hold/hug/pick her up? Even in homes where parents don't pay a lot of attention to their children, kids still speak way before 3 years old, even if they just get some words or phrases from tv or people who come over to visit.
She could be simply suffering from neglect, but a developmental disorder such as autism could be a possibility as well. Is her mother suffering from any type of chronic condition like major depression or any type of learning disability?
sounds a lot like my granddaughter who has dyspraxia of speech. she is getting speech therapy and is now making progress albiet slowly. she also has these meltdowns and we think its because its the only way she can express herself. her undersanding of language is normal as is her intelligence. does this girl understand everything thats said to her and appear normal in every other respect. certainly sounds like she should be assesed for speech therapy.