Could I have a learning difficulty?
Hi I was hoping someone on here could give me some advice as a think I might have a learning difficulty and I have no idea what to do about it. Iím 19 and in college. I have never been diagnosed with anything but these are things I have always struggled with.
I find speaking is quite difficult and takes a lot of effort. I tend to slur my words and mumble. And I find it difficult to know the right words to use or what order to say the words in. I have problems understanding other people when they speak and sometimes have to ask them to repeat themselves a number of times before I understand. I also find it difficult to grasp how to integrate myself into a conversation. How/ when do I start talking? I canít seem to pick up the social cues or body language that other people just get.
I also find it hard to control my hands, things like using a pen can be difficult and if I want to write neatly it takes a very long time. If I donít pay close attention then my hand jerks or moves in a way I donít want it to. I always struggled in school with sports. I can run swim and ride a bike fine. But things like football or tennis was always impossible. I donít seem to be able to judge speeds or distances at all, which is making learning to drive very difficult. I canít tell how close I am to curbs etc, or tell how long it will take me to stop at the traffic lights.
I have always been told that I am slow. To the point where my friends nicknamed me Snail. It takes a long time for me to process what someone has said or done. If I am in a group dynamic I often find that by the time I have figured out what they are saying and am ready to answer they are already talking about something else. I have very slow reaction times and find unexpected things very hard to process. Course work seems to take me a lot longer than others in my class. I can work almost constantly, stopping just to eat shower etc, from 9 oíclock one day, when I get up, till two the next morning and still not manage to get as much done as I wanted to. My tutors keep complaining that I donít put enough effort in, because I often donít manage to complete my work on time. But I know that I put a lot more effort in to my course work than some other people in my class, as I rarely do anything else. And yet I always feel like Iím running behind because I canít do things at the same speed as other people. It doesnít help that I have a very short attention span; I find that I canít concentrate hard on something for more than 10/15 minutes before I drift in to space. My mind jumps around from one thing to the next very quickly, it seems like all the speed that I have lost in my body and reactions etc. has gone in to my thoughts instead, but simultaneously I can never tell the passage of time. Hours can go past without me realising it, and the whole time I will have been staring blankly at a wall or something.
I have a very bad memory as well; I canít remember the big things in my life such as my sisterís wedding etc. I know that they happened but I canít remember any details about it. I struggle to follow instructions as I forget them almost straight away. I always forget what day of the week it is or how many days/ weeks it has been sinceÖ happened etc.
Iíve been seeing my doctor for three weeks now for chronic depression, and I realise that some of these things can be attributed to that. But I just have an overwhelming sense that thereís something else that isnít right with me. I am going back to my doctor on the 21st. would this be something that I should bring up with her? If I do what happens from there? Does it sound like I might have some kind of learning difficulty? I really donít know much about this stuff at all and I donít want to bother her if I am totally off the mark.
Thanks for reading, any advice/ input would be most appreciated.