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Old 04-30-2004, 12:07 PM   #1
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playdrv4me HB User
Leukemia or HIV.

I had a very low risk sexual exposure (oral both ways) with two women at 3 and 4 months ago and have tested negative for HIV out to 10.5 weeks from the last exposure, however I have been experiencing symptoms that I can not rule out as just about anything BUT Leukemia or HIV.

It all started about a week after the second exposure, swollen lymph nodes in my neck that lasted for at least three weeks before I visited the doctor and she prescribed an antibiotic which I BELIEVE is what made them go away. During and since that time, Ive had fevers that come and go as high as 101 degrees (though thats pretty much over now), Loss of appetite for about 1.5 weeks, 10lb weight loss (holding steady at 225), A butterfly style rash on my cheeks, folliculitis or boils on my legs and body, occasional malaise, a post nasal drip that WILL NOT leave, occasional discomfort in the mid-back, SEVERE eye floaters (which I have been able to connect only to Leukemia and CMV Virus in AIDS being that im only 21 and Retinal Detachment is rare, plus my eye doctor yesterday said that my retinas looked healthy), dry mouth for weeks (YEA, i know, youre like... this guys gonna die in like a week), occasional weakness and fatigue, and my eye sockets burned bad one night. Just a myriad of crazy things. The two im most concerned with right NOW is the eye floaters, and the Post Nasal Drip. Though for a while I had abdominal numb pain unless I ate which worried me too. Right now I seem to have "normalized" somewhat and I feel pretty good except for the floaters in my eyes and the rash on my cheeks that never went away. Also I had some petechiae where a laptop bag strap rubbed against my arm or something that went away after a few days.

The only other consensus I can come to is Diabetes or Lupus, which trust me, at this point I will be perfectly happy to hear (it (diabetes) does run in my moms side of the family). The problem is my symptoms are so vague its hard to get my doctor to REALLY pay attention, though so far she has gotten CBCs on me, done a TSH test for Thyroid problems, three HIV tests so far (ill be out of the window period at 13 weeks) , and STD testing for the major ones. It should be noted that Leukemia is not a prevalent disease in my family.

Im very scared here because I am at that point of psychosis where I KNOW that professing any kind of disease over yourself is a terrible thing, but I just want to hear SOMETHING, i want to know what is going on inside me.

Please give me some insite into Leukemia. Im sorry for this long post.

Thanks Again!

Last edited by playdrv4me; 04-30-2004 at 04:43 PM.

 
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Old 04-30-2004, 06:52 PM   #2
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Re: Leukemia or HIV.

The eye floaters can be caused by something as simple as too high a fat diet. If you eat a lot of fried foods bile can back up into your liver and cause the visual problems. High blood pressure can also cause the floaters. Passing viruses unrelated to HIV or other immune system compromising diseases can also occur. You did not say whether or not your doctor ran a test for HEP C.
The butterfly rash is sometimes indicative of lupus an automimmune disorder. Leukemia is very easy to diagnose and separate from other vague illnesses.
Leukemia is not a subtle disease. Chronic Fatigue syndrome can have some of the symptoms you suggest as well. Try to just ride it out and if your life is not being restricted by your symptoms, you will probably gradually recover fully. Just check with your doctor if you get worse.

 
Old 04-30-2004, 10:33 PM   #3
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Re: Leukemia or HIV.

please believe me when i say that all you need is a full blood panel done. when you get those results, trust them. they can test for al the things you are worried about, you will get your answers and be able to lead a normal life. no really you will.

i have developed a terrible case of illness anxiety. because of this i have had 7 blood panels drawn, 4 ultra sounds, a baruim enema, an upper gi series and 2 consultaions with a surgeon. i have had such awful panic attacks that i have been put on meds, but it is to the point that it is all consuming.

i too was convinced that i had HIV. i actually got a near fatal colon infection after the birth of my son that is typically seen in patients with leukemia or AIDS. the infection has like a 1 in 20,000 tchance to infect a would be healthy person. i happened to be that 1 person.

i tested negative for HIV and they took literally 40 vials of blood from me in the hospital to find out what i had. everything was fine. but i still cant shake the fear that they missed something.

you have no idea how hard it has been to move past all of this. i would suggest getting that blood panel and then dealing with anything from that point if you need too. i would bet that your mind is doing most all of this to you. dont be afraid to see a mental health pro as well, you can get on some meds that will help. i know exactly whay you are feeling, please dont let it go as far as i have.
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Old 05-01-2004, 12:35 AM   #4
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playdrv4me HB User
Re: Leukemia or HIV.

Thank you both very much for your replies. I agree about not letting this get out of hand, and its starting to for me. I am to the point where I will be excited or happy about something and I literally think to myself "but im sick anyway so what does this matter now". And then the rational side of me completely refutes alot of my irrational beliefs, for example, I know that CMV Retinitis, is a LATE STAGE AIDS symptom, and not even for all AIDS sufferers, only a percentage, and at this point I havent even tested positive yet!! But then I fall back in the trap because I feel my vision is going blurry in my right eye, and the number of floaters in my right eye is pretty high, what concerns me most is the dark cloudy ones that float by occasionally, and one that seems to hang right at the edge of my vision in the right eye. I keep thinking its the CMV slowly "eating away" at my Retina.

A question for nyxin... What is a full blood panel? I had a Complete Blood Count done at 4 weeks post exposure that showed two particularly interesting counts. I believe WBC was at about 12.0 (high) and Lymphocytes was about 9.0 (low). The doctor claimed this was ok because I was fighting the bacterial infection that caused the swollen neck nodes which she prescribed the medicine for. The STD screen at 4 weeks was a general screen which I know covered Ghonorrea and Chlamydia, I dont know if it covered HPV, or HEPC.

I just hate having the feeling that my body is saying something in bright red letters and I cant read it. It is somewhat relieving to know that Leukemia at least, is not a "maybe yes maybe no, we need to analyze this" kind of situation.

I just want to move past this... Ive gotten to where I view the general public as "the healthy ones" when Im out and about while looking at myself as a soon to be possible statistic.

One thing I have to say, the people here, and on the HIV board I have asked questions on have always been a rock of strength for me to cling to in fighting this emotional/physical battle. A one line sentence from a single person can sometimes be enough to stem the tide of fear that comes from needlessly researching hours of medical data.

 
Old 05-01-2004, 04:11 AM   #5
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Re: Leukemia or HIV.

If you want to put your mind to ease now, just have a bone marrow biopsy and that will tell if you have leukemia. By the way, leukemia is NOT inherited and anyone can be the first in the family to come down with this dreaded disease such has my gf.

 
Old 05-01-2004, 10:36 AM   #6
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playdrv4me HB User
Re: Leukemia or HIV.

Quote:
Originally Posted by LIBLONDIE45
If you want to put your mind to ease now, just have a bone marrow biopsy and that will tell if you have leukemia. By the way, leukemia is NOT inherited and anyone can be the first in the family to come down with this dreaded disease such has my gf.
I am very sorry to hear about your loved one and I agree with you, the research I have done over the past few days shows nothing conclusive regarding family history of leukemia increasing risk. In fact from what ive seen, Leukemia seems to affect the healthy as much as much as it does the un-healthy. In a way, I almost feel like ignoring this possibility because I fear if I find out I have it, unlike HIV which has various forms of treatment, Leukemia MAY or MAY NOT have options anyway.

The first poster mentioned Lupus and I think this is a very good possibility as well, the Rash does not go across both cheeks as it does in typified Lupus, but it does go from one cheek, over the nose, and to roughly half of my other cheek. Alot of my other symptoms seem indicative of Lupus as well, but then some make no sense, such as the eye floaters.

 
Old 05-13-2004, 06:59 PM   #7
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ysco HB User
Re: Leukemia or HIV.

These floaters should be your least concern. There are pretty common and usually resolve by themselves with time. It is completely irrational that it is relates to CMV, because you got tested neg for HIV. You should trust these tests, they are reliable enough.

As for your other complaints, I don't think they are indicative for the diseases you have mentioned at all. Perhaps you need some consulting to help you get these thoughts out of your head.

 
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