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Old 12-23-2004, 12:15 PM   #1
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end stage liver HELP!!

My husband has end stage liver also Hep c, he vomits blood 3 more more times a day has been in bed for three days now will not go to hospital no med ins and they don't do anything anyways belly is size of large beach ball. HELP!!!!! what do I do

 
Old 12-23-2004, 04:00 PM   #2
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Exclamation Re: end stage liver HELP!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by bikert
My husband has end stage liver also Hep c, he vomits blood 3 more more times a day has been in bed for three days now will not go to hospital no med ins and they don't do anything anyways belly is size of large beach ball. HELP!!!!! what do I do
By the time a person has such a great amount of fluid in his abdomen that its sticks out as described, his liver is in extremely bad shape. Is he with it enough to give you a durable power of attorney for health care? He would need to sign a form you could pick up at the hospital or doctors office probably. One of the scariest things for people who are dying is to be in extreme pain with no one helping to relieve their suffering. If his big belly is causing him trouble breathing, then I would roll up the head of the bed or put several pillows behind his back, this will lift his ribcage up so that he is in a semi-sitting position. I would tell him what I want to do and ask if he will allow it. If he is having pain, I would call the doctor in the morning and get him some pain medicine. If he cant swollow a pill, I would crush the pill and mix it with applesauce. I would take a wet cloth and keep his mouth moistened so he doesnt feel like its dry. If he vomits blood, I would clean him up gently. If he quits breathing, I would have asked the doctor for permission to allow nature to take its course (tomorrow morning I would ask the doctor to tell the paramedics to not do CPR if you feel comfortable with that). You should be able to Hospice Care if you are in California. Write back if you want and I will check a little later if you have other concerns.

 
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Old 12-23-2004, 04:22 PM   #3
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

thanks, He has no Doctor so has no meds at all. he is awake and responds to me. he want to die cant take it anymoreand want a time frame. I tell him he is in God's hand now. But he has good and bad days so the good ones he drinks to kill the pain and the bad he is in bed. I Love him so I there is not a thing I can do. talking to someone anyone who is supporting is good all I do is help him and cry ay night Thank god I able to work out of my home so he is no by him self thanks so much good to hear from someone how bad is his dealth going to be ???

 
Old 12-23-2004, 05:26 PM   #4
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Exclamation Re: end stage liver HELP!!

If there is absolutely no way to get him a doctor and you have already tried then keep up the good work and just try and keep him comfortable. Does he have any wants now? Is he able to breathe ok? Does he have pain? The theory is to keep the patient not feeling pain, difficulty breathing that type of thing. I dont know how long it will be but if they told you he has end stage liver disease and he is not getting out of bed, then it sounds like he is getting sicker. Is he able to urinate ok? Is he having normal BMs? Are you in the USA? In California at least we would have a nurse come out and visit.

You are experiencing a very human event. You need to take care of yourself too and get some rest. Is there anyone who can help you so you can not spend all your time with him or working. If he says ok, you might try turning him on his side through out the day.

I will be here for awhile longer. Write me if you wish. I just went through a similar experience with my father having a major heart attack and ending up in critical condition. He made it luckily but his life has been greatly shortened.

 
Old 12-23-2004, 05:59 PM   #5
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

I would reccommend taking him to the ER, they can NOT turn him away and maybe they can give him morphine for the pain. Do you have HOPE HOSPICE? If you do...call them asap. They can come to your house and give pain meds. Right now he needs to be comfortable. They sometimes can drain his stomach....if he's past that then his death shouldn't be far away... a few days a week. Get his affairs in order while you can. The power of attorney is an excellant idea, I know it's hard to think of such a thing but it will be better for you and him in the long run by protecting yourselfs financially. Just by being with him helps him alot I'm sure. Does he like the bible? How about reading to him to get his mind off of the pain? Remember your not alone either..angels wait by both of your sides to help you. Don't leave anything unsaid. Your both in my prayers.

 
Old 12-23-2004, 07:39 PM   #6
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Question Re: end stage liver HELP!!

See you people at 0530 (5:30AM) in the morning.

 
Old 12-24-2004, 03:16 AM   #7
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

Bikert:
Just wanted to check in with you on how the night went? Your husband legally has the absolute right to refuse any treatment. This includes treatment for hepatitis and taking the ambulance another time just to not to get any treatment at the hospital. it sounds like he is lucid enough to make up his own mind on these things. Let me know if there is anything else I can do. You are really a good woman and I respect you for sticking with your man during these troubled times.

 
Old 12-24-2004, 06:08 AM   #8
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

I guess I do not understand why in the heck you are getting ready for him to die when he has never ever been treated???am I the only one here who thinks this is just a little bizarre??for gods sake, get on the phone and call 911 and get him into the hospital asap!there are many many treatments availiable and different ways to pay.This is much better alternative than death!don't you think??If his condition is being caused by anything but cancer,there is hope for a very successful recovery here.My son was in about as bad a shape as you can get without actually dying.He was only 13 at the time.He is now 17 and living an extremely full life.you wouldn't even know he has had a Tx.He does all of the stuff his friends do with no problem.

if your husband has gotten to the point you are describing, I can almost guarentee you that he is also suffering from encephalopathy,which happens when the body is building up toxins from all of the crap going on in there.This creates ammonia that goes to the brain and causes significant mental cloudiness.Your husband is NOT in his right mind right now so when he says that he wants to die it is most likely due to the overwhelming pain he is experiencing,NOT WHAT HE ACTUALLY WANTS!!please call 911,how can you just let him lie there dying right in front of your eyes like this???there are many programs that will help you out with regard to the financial aspects of his care.Once you get to the hosp they will set you up automatically with a social worker whos sole purpose is to help you through this in any way she possibly can.for god sakes, there IS good treatment availiable for his condition,trust me.My son had only days to live when he was able to finally get his new liver.how could you live with yourself if you do nothing to help him.i am certain you are feeling quite overwhelmed by everything but you need to act now to save your husband.PLEASE GET HIM TO A HOSPITAL NOW!!!pick up the phone,call 911 and get the ball rolling.please keep us posted,your husband needs you to do this for him.Marcia

 
Old 12-24-2004, 06:30 AM   #9
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

Thanks , But I have taken him by ambulance 10 times they get him stable in th ER and then send him home.they tell him there is nothing let they can do for him. I have applied for every kind and type of help and have been turned down. and no I do not have any one that can help, they all have there own life and families, he does have two sisters and they are both nurses, but they do not help, they just scold him because he caused this himself with his drinking and that he has the devil in him thats why he is being tortured. I tell him that is not true God loves him no matter what to just have faith. I used to be a medical asst 7 years so I know what to do, But the pain his belly with a protuding umbilcal hernia, sometimes I think he is going to explode when he cough. At this point all I do I pray that God will have mercy on him
Thanks to your replies at least I have someone talk to

 
Old 12-24-2004, 06:59 AM   #10
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

"Thanks , But I have taken him by ambulance 10 times they get him stable in th ER and then send him home.they tell him there is nothing let they can do for him. I have applied for every kind and type of help and have been turned down. and no I do not have any one that can help, they all have there own life and families, he does have two sisters and they are both nurses, but they do not help, they just scold him because he caused this himself with his drinking and that he has the devil in him thats why he is being tortured. I tell him that is not true God loves him no matter what to just have faith. I used to be a medical asst 7 years so I know what to do, But the pain his belly with a protuding umbilcal hernia, sometimes I think he is going to explode when he cough. At this point all I do I pray that God will have mercy on him
Thanks to your replies at least I have someone talk to"

The reason she is talking about his death, is based on his physical status, the doctors have determined that he is getting towards the end of his life. She states she has taken him to the ER 10 times and that they tell her there is nothing they can do. I dont think the middle class mentality understands that if one is poor in parts of the USA, the health care can be horrible. Look at this poor lady, have a little compassion for her not being able to get the help she needs. She needs to sleep all night and have 3 relaxed meals a day. Where I live we are known as a liberal state but yet there are hobos all over downtown. Men, woman and children actually live by the river in little camps. Just a few days ago we were asked by two hobos for money when we went downtown.

I would call the hospital and get the "Do Not Resucitate" order in writing from your husband. If you cant get down to the hospital then I would call them and ask them to mail a copy to me so your husband can legally sign it. This way you are legally covered for following his wishes. Im not sure that he has excess ammonia in his blood causing hepatic encephalopathy(poor thinking due to liver not working right). I will be back in a little while but I will pray for you today.

 
Old 12-24-2004, 07:17 AM   #11
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Unhappy Re: end stage liver HELP!!

I have sold everything my home we now live in a trailer we are 150,0000 in debt,and know way to pay it back they do not treat you for free!!!! the stress sometimes is unbearble I get headache all the time. I weigh 98lbs when I do get time to eat I soooo many other things to do like work. I have not been out of the house in 3 weeks. I'm scard to leave he might die and I would not be there. SO DO NOT SAY THAT I AM NOT TRYING TO HELP !!!!!! THIS IS THE FOURTH MAN IN MY LIFE THAT HAS DIED WITH ME BY THERE SIDE DOING EVERYTHING I CAN MY FIRST HUSBAND @ 31 HEART ATTACK -MY FIRST GRANDSON # 3 MONTH WITH ALS MY DAD WITH PANCRETIS CANCER NOW MY HUSBAND. SO DO TELL ME I AM NOT DOING WHAT I CAN!!!!

 
Old 12-24-2004, 08:03 AM   #12
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

Dear Bikert,
I'm sorry that your going through this alone. You might want to call the Hospice in your area. They can be very helpful because they are trained in the area of death and dieing. I never had any experience before until I worked in the office in our local office. The people in our Hospice were so loving, caring and helpful not only to the patient but for the family.
My thoughts and prayers are with you
and your husband
Barb

 
Old 12-24-2004, 08:31 AM   #13
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

Bikert:
I have to go now but you are having a rosary said for you and your husband this morning. We will be praying activly for you and your husband. I will check in later if there is any other advice I can help you with.
cmmm47

 
Old 12-24-2004, 08:49 AM   #14
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

Thank you all so much !!!!! He is feeling better so far to day he temo is up from yesterday it was 97.2 today it is 98.2 so thats good. he had some toast and cranberry juice and it is staying down so far. so maybe the prayers a helping !!!!!! thats what my days are filled with Thanks again

 
Old 12-24-2004, 04:31 PM   #15
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Re: end stage liver HELP!!

Bikert
Church tomorrow and another rosary to be said for you and your husband. I hope our prayers keep things going well with your husband and you

sincerely,
cmmm47

 
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