HEEEELLLLLOOOO every body
would like to share my happy time as you all so good to share my sad.
I have as you know been in a terrible placxe recently, The mental wall between me and life was unmovable and i slept all day, and ventured to achieve nothing.
Of course i blamed this on my Lyme.
When i stared the thread "very depressed"!
I was actually close to the big S!!!!
I stood back form my situation and relaised my hysteria was unbearable at night, the dissasociation of every thing i knew around me ment i lost my child and my llife each night. Every thing I loved was not real. The panic for where they were or did they exist was nothing but torment.
I thought Lyme was killing me off, mentally.
Then i thought, its always after I take my Depakote so i stopped. for 1 night and i was like the cat that got the cream, my body went into pure relaxation an dpleasure mode and i slept like a baby. With the comfort of knowing i was real.
I am as allergic to the depakote as i am to Lithium, Martazapine and any other drug i have tried.
My phyciatrist is in shock and i think again its ignoranc to assume there cant be a human with adverse systems to tabs.
I think what i am trying to pass on is , i am so worried for you all now.
I know Lyme is debilitating , painfull and mind altering, but how many may be getting it from the anti depressants and blaming the Lyme.
I advised my phyciatrist that i had ate a cough sweet that gave me the same physical symptoms as these anti'Ds.
" thats your obsession with your physical side as there is nothing in cough sweets that is in Depakote"
Well as i always say, " i know my body and i know im right and to me that was a challenge"
I studied and researched for hours and i have found that titanium oxide is in.
Anti'Ds, cough sweet, and to my suprise the one thing im realy allergic to is " allergy tablets"
Titanium Oxide is (E171) and is a seperater found in tabs, sauces, sweets and so many products.
What nailed this research for me is, out of all the E numbers this one has residue left in the Lymph System.
there for is it possible that with my Lymph system already backllogged (E171) is to me, like pooring petrol on a fire.
I couldnt wait to come on and get your guys thoughts on this.
If any one out there is up on teh E numbers please share your knowledge.
AND the happy thread ends with.
I have been off Depakote for 2 days and to day I have been helping the builder!!! ( bit stiff now, but such fun )
I have washed up , whisteled running up and down stairs with out even thinking about it..
I have back a bit of me, have tears while writting this, as i know you will all relate so!! much.
I do need depression support so i am down to a childs tablet called Epilium.
Hoping i can process it ok. still has teh E171 but im rekoning at a lower dose.
My body is just saying IM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
Love to you all and if you have read this thread you are an angel.
to you all..