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Old 07-23-2006, 08:47 AM   #1
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yup....did it again!.....and questions too..thanks!

Well....first I'm sorry I've not been on in so long! For those who've seen me in the past? I know you'll understand EXACTLY what I mean when I say I overdid(thinking of course I was doing SOOOOOOOO WELL) and w/o going into all the details(hehe...ya got lucky today!...) I ended up in bed for lil over 2 and 1/2 weeks w/a fever between 100-102. Funny thing about it all? I called my LLMD and was quickly told I was overdoing and setting myself up for a relapse and to STOP IT!(in a nice way of course) .....but in the back of my mind I was thinking..."yeah right...so that's your opinion but I KNOW I just have a little bug that's gonna go away soon....you just wait and see!"..... Well, then once I finally was actually ABLE to get out of bed I went to see a local doc who happened to not know my history. I thought it was kinda neat they didn't have all the "stuff" to fill out .....like past surgeries, illnesses..blahblahblah.......takes me FOREVER and never can remember all the dates, etc. I just had to check mark symptoms basically. I get in the room and she asked me about this and that symptom then just sat frozen for a sec. I looked and said "WHAT?" .....she asked if I'd been outdoors lately. Uhhh....nope..been in the bed over 2 weeks now! She said "no..before..like a camping trip or something?"........i just looked at her. She said "You'd be surprised at all the tickborne illnesses I've seen this year....we need to run a full panel on you." I just died laffin then! Too weak to laugh much but you know what I mean.........Then I gave her the quick lowdown. She told me the same. STOP IT! You're setting yourself up for a relapse! ...I am glad she knew about it and all but it really wasn't what I wanted to hear. I've pretty much just been doing the "chill/relax thing" since then.....as I promised my parents even that's what I would do. Not that I honestly feel a choice. Oh well. Lesson learned.....had better be this time anyway! Hopefully my tellin this will stop someone else too. .....setbacks big or small are NOT fun!ugggggh!
Ok...now what I'm wondering.....I would REALLY love feedback on this too!!!!!
Does anyone else out there have others make comments about you "rambling"...getting off track while you're talking or going subject to subject? ....Not that I don't know I do but sheez....I get so tired of people actually commenting on it! Makes it really hard to w/new people in life. I mean my family and friends who've been there forever all don't seem to think anything about it or we just laugh it off or they'll get me back on track but new people just look at me and say something....that's usually hurtful too. I'm just wondering....Is it just me who does this or anyone else out there?? I know the right side of my brain had gotten really swollen and there was "homogenous O2 loss" all over my brain but I've really thought all that was better........if not gone. Well......ok, I'd say just TONS better. I'm so tired of people saying things and not that I care what people say or think so much but it truly is a hindrance at times. Yes.....my attitude is that if they don't want to take the time to focus on the good things about me and try to understand then too bad for them but at the same time I do hate it. ....and yes, I'm MUCH worse when I'm tired or get too much going. Anyone else??? ...and yeah...i take my adderall daily and sometimes seems to help and other times not. ....ok, before I start to ramble now!aaaack!lol!.....any feedback???
.....hope everybody's doing well too! I gotta read through the posts and catch up!!!
cindy

 
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Old 07-24-2006, 06:30 AM   #2
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Re: yup....did it again!.....and questions too..thanks!

Hi Cindy,

It's good to hear from you again. sorry you,ve been feeling so bad.

1. No you shouldn't overdo it. Yes you should take it easy. Yes we ALL do the same thing. No we NEVER learn and still keep doing it!

2. Despite your illness, it is good news at least that the doctor you saw considered LD straight away, but not so good news that it seems to be on the increase.

3. This is just my opinion, but I have the feeling that before illness struck you were an extremely lively and bouncy person. That part of your personality shines through in your post. Perhaps the only outlet you still have (at the moment) for all that energy is when you think and speak, and as a result everything keeps tumbling out at once. I you add the deep physical fatigue you must be feeling at the moment it makes a bit of an odd mix for the two to work together.

Many very intelligent people jump about from one subject to another making it hard for others to keep up with them. It is probably because their ideas are coming through too quickly for them to express them.

Lyme does mess about with so much and is probably making you feel a bit more confused and anxious, but I don't think that we need to reserve a place on the funny farm for you just yet! At least you aren't dull and boring!

Janet

 
Old 07-24-2006, 08:52 PM   #3
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Re: yup....did it again!.....and questions too..thanks!

Hi cindy - good to hear from you.

You silly goose - don't go doing that to yourself!! We need you here!

Janet - well said! I agree.

For heavens sake kiddo - take care! I know its hard, but try to remind yourself to sit, take a deep breath, get to bed early ( I know - who wants to do that when you're feeling better?).

Peace and health to you,
Mickie

Last edited by 6Blues; 07-24-2006 at 08:53 PM.

 
Old 08-19-2006, 04:47 AM   #4
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Re: yup....did it again!.....and questions too..thanks!

Sorry I'm just now getting back on this one but I just wanted to say thanks for the help/advice!!!!!

You hit it on the head janet in that yes, i've always been a live one for sure and extremely active and a talker to boot........bet you'd have never guessed that one huh?lol!!!!! You're so right that now that I can't take it all out physically or even do all mentally I try to make up for it or compensate or ???? verbally and whew....diarrhea of the mouth at times! I think you're very right too that intelligent people think and different subjects come to mind and when we're not in the mode of staying focused it's easy to ramble. I don't mean to harp on it and know this is extreme for most right now but I truly am SOOOOOOO grateful to be able to play tennis again not only for the physical and just wearing myself out when I'm able but it also forces me to stay focused and that's such a trained thing I think. ...anyway...thank you....thank you SO MUCH!!!! I may think of things on my own but having them told(or written..whatever!) to me makes a huge difference!!

And Mickie you're exactly right on the going to bed thing! I think this fits for most all of us except if you get in that mode of sleeping basically continually as I did for a long time ...that you become a nightowl and that's when you feel best but forcing yourself to go to bed makes an incredible difference on how you feel, think...everything! I didn't realize that for a long time and also thought I just "couldn't help it" for a long long time too but finally grabbed the reigns(sp) and when I force myself to get in bed around 9:30-10 then may watch a bit of tv but make sure by 1030 to 11 I have the lights out and am eyes closed wow do I do better!!! I get offtrack of course from time to time and have been back and forth lately but that's always something on my regular "keep in check" list. Thanks for the reminder and again just hearing it from someone else!

Again I'm sorry for just now responding. Seems it's been one busy summer as I'm sure for all it has been........well, busy yet not? Think that's strangely life now for me???

Just wanted all to know how much I appreciate the care/concern/love/advice and all else on this board! oh...and the understanding too! That's a big one!! It honestly means more than you know!!!!!
love and hugs!!!
cindy

 
Old 08-19-2006, 08:04 AM   #5
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Re: yup....did it again!.....and questions too..thanks!

Hi Cindy.....YES!!!! I did that also when I was just full of those critters...actually I thought it was normal ...you know just me....and I drove people nuts...I was diagnoised as being Bi-polar...and A.D.D...they put me on addreall also...didn't help though....just made my head spin more....but now that I have had 6 years of treatment...my mouth is quiet...I mean real quiet...sometimes I think I liked the other way better..... Couple of people that were close to me would laugh about it and get me restarted and wow I could have like 50 topics going at the same time...Some people thought that because I was as skinny as a rail and because I talked alot that I was doing drugs off the street....LOL.....

So my guess is as your treatment gets those lymies under control,,your mind, thoughts and mouth will calm down also....for now have fun with it...I had many laughs from it...and I had people get on me about it....don't worry sweetie....it'll get better......

Good luck with your treatment....Sounds like you have alot of fight and spunk in you!!!!

Hugs

 
Old 08-19-2006, 09:48 AM   #6
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Re: yup....did it again!.....and questions too..thanks!

Hi Cindy,

I think we've all had the experience of "overdoing it" and thinking it would be ok only to find outselves unable to get out of bed for days or weeks afterward. Maddening as it can be, recovery from this is very gradual and we must pace ourselves accordingly.

As for the people who make hurtful remarks, maybe they're not the sort of people you want to be around anyway? Some people you can't avoid, but if they're "friends" you may want to find some new friends that don't make hurtful remarks and who value you for who you are and appreciate what you do have to offer.

 
Old 08-19-2006, 03:16 PM   #7
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Re: yup....did it again!.....and questions too..thanks!

eek......maybe i read something wrong or who knows??? I know noone meant anything bad but I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better than I once was I can't even tell you!!! I first started treatment in 1995. If you had only seen me then. yikes! I tell people all the time now that if I were to stay even as is the rest of my life i'd be ok. In comparison that's true. .....I've evidently had this in me since the early 70s but then in 93 it hit with a vengence. I just go for maintenance at this point. Does anyone ever really get over everything??????? I can't even imagine. don't get me wrong here....I'm happy and life is good. It's not as I expected but I have no complaints. I just don't know what to do differently at this point. I certainly don't want to regress any........
.........sorry if I sound negative. With this stupid eye thing I got little to no sleep last nite and just woke up from an all day sleep marathon. Not a normal day for me at all. I'm ready to just claw this eye out!eeeek!....oh well.....things have been worse for sure and it should be better by Tues the doc said.
thanks for the input and encouragement!! maybe one day I really will COMPLETELY get over it all??......I shouldn't complain now as at least I'm so much better and never dreamed of getting this far. Nor did anyone else for me.

 
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