I am not feeling great. I am about 50/60% of the person I used to be two years ago. (Wearing bikinis, surfing, dancing, whaaaaaa!! I want that person back so badly!)
Nevertheless, I want to share these tid bits of my daily life:
> I was too sick to get off the couch. I lived there 24/7 for about a year. I slept on the couch, I worked there, I ate there, I sat there - all day & night. Well, about two weeks ago I started sleeping in my bedroom again. It was such a mess that I pushed the pile of clothes and clutter off the side and left it all there, but I am sleeping in my room again.
> I mowed my lawn. I could barely breath afterwards and I was red as a beet and drenched with sweat - but I did it!
> I do dishes a few times a week. Lo-o-o-ong time since I cared about a little thing like dirty dishes.
> If I drop something, I pick it up. I used to drop things or spill things and just leave them where they fell - too sick to care.
> For at least a year now I haven't cared about returning phone calls or making calls to family or the 2 friends I have left. I was too sick to chit chat. The answering machines were full for weeks and I didn't care. Well, twice now I have picked up the phone and initiated a friendly conversation.
> This one is hard for me to admit, but I was too sick to care about grooming. I was known for being groomed and always well-dressed and a bit glamorous. Having Lyme, I didn't shower, I took a detox bath only when I was well enough to drag my butt upstairs, I didn't care what I looked like, what dirty clothes I was wearing, I hardly ever brushed my teeth. Now, I am brushing my teeth a few times a day (Thank You God!), changing my clothes - not every day - but maybe every other day, and I am aware when I stink.
I still hurt A LOT, I still don't have my sense of balance, I still have oscillopsia (jiggling vision), I still have fatigue, I still bust out crying for no reason, I puke once in a while and I still have 50 extra pounds so I wear pajamas or sweats most of the time. But I see tangible improvement.
I want to share these little joyfull baby steps in my recovery because I remember how crappy I felt and I felt that it would never end.
So - HANG IN THERE EVERYONE! We will beat this disease together.
Peace and health to all of us,