I am so sorry to hear you're having so many problems, that is such a HORRIBLE feeling and I know EXACTLY what you are going thru! Your story sounds just like mine. I thought I was going out of my mind, and then my doctor put me on a low dose of Prozac and it helped my crying spurts and those uncontrollable feelings. I still have the anxiety like crazy and I don't think prozac really treats the anxiety symptoms, mainly just the depression and the mood swings. (boy, did I have mood swings!) But it has helped tremendously.
You should check into some anxiety or depression type meds., I don't know if you are up for taking something like that but with the way you feel, it's worth a try. You need to get help, it's not something you can control on your own, or at least that's been my case. I know some people are really against these drugs but I say Bring Them On!
My memory and thinking is still really bad, I deal with it on a daily basis it seems. I'll have spells where it is worse and I can feel it coming on. I feel so stupid sometimes and lose track of what I am saying and then I panic cause I know it's happening and then the anxiety flares up and the palpitations start going! It's miserable!
I was talking to my mom on the phone today and at least 2-3 times I had to ask "now what were we talking about?" cause my mind seems to wonder and I can forget a thought in the middle of the sentence. I told my Mom to bear with me cause I'm having a bad day, she is so understanding. I can't find the right words and it makes me feel like an idiot. I feel like I'm not very smart anymore! I just keep praying that it goes away, it's so frustrating.
And SEX?! What is that, I forgot?! I have had no sex drive for about a year now, it's just gone, disappeared, it has checked out. I know the prozac can have those side effects, too, but I would rather be sain then have sex right now! LOL
Oh, I feel so bad for you, Jarlena...
I hope you have friends and family who support you cause that is so important. After a while, it seems people give up on you and it's actually embarrassing to be so sick all the time. People get sick of hearing about it so I try not to talk about it, and if I'm asked I don't go into it a whole lot cause they don't understand. Unless they do research on the lyme disease, they have NO IDEA what we are going thru. I've had problems with my husband, although my family and friends are so supportive. I'm lucky in that way, thank God.
Hang in there, go see your doctor and let him/her know how you are feeling, you really need some help before it drives you bonkers.
I wish you well,